by Marty Coleman | Dec 30, 2009 | John Ray |
Here is an illustration of how this works (at least for a male).
When I was in college I visited a friend in Boston. I went to a party at his house. While there I went searching for the bathroom upstairs. The hall was very dark and dull, the window showed a dark sky with snow falling. A door was slightly cracked open with a bit of light peeking through. There was no one in the hall but I asked out loud where the bathroom was anyway.
The cracked door swung open bringing a bright light followed by an impossibly long sweep of jet black hair falling into the hall. A beautiful female face with a big smile was attached to the hair. She swung her head my way, pointed down the hall and said ‘thataway’.
Everything about that moment has stayed in my mind for three decades. But the center of that memory is the smile. That was the sword that stopped me in my tracks that night.
I made sure I met the person with the beautiful face, radiant smile and the long black hair. We became friends and still are to this day, though we often lose track of each other for years. She turned out to not be a big smiler, nor very much of a happy person at all. But the sword she wielded on that day still shines in my mind.
That is how it worked on me that day and, I suspect, on many others as well.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“Beauty is power and a smile is its sword.” – John Ray, 1627-1705, English naturalist
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 29, 2009 | Bernard Bailey, Marty Coleman |
Want to raise a spoiled kid? Don’t teach them this.
Want to raise a well balanced kid who will be able to deal with the ebb and flow of fortune and misfortune? Teach them this. Make sure you have your arm around them and they know they are loved as you explain it to them.
And don’t worry, they will still know they are the center of YOUR universe, no matter how hard you try to persuade them otherwise.
Drawing © Marty Coleman
“Science has found the center of the universe. You’re not it.” – adapted from a quote by Bernard Bailey
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 28, 2009 | William Boetcker |
The point being….
“Better to be a strong person with a weak point than a weak person without a strong point”.
It is another way of saying…move forward! Take that step even if you aren’t the expert, the experienced one.
Be strong and volunteer for that new assignment. Be strong and submit that drawing to the competition. Do NOT wait until you have no flaws. You remove the flaws or weaknesses by the act of doing, not by waiting around for the flaw to leave of its own accord.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
Quote (including the part in quotations in the commentary) by William J. H. Boetcker, 1863-1962, German-born American Presbyterian Minister
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 27, 2009 | Jerry Garcia |
The dilemma of the artist and their desire for attention, admiration, dissemination, success is in how to be unique but still have people be able to relate to you and your work.
When I was applying for teaching jobs back in the 80s and 90s I once had a Professor from UCLA, the Chairman of the Art Department, tell me that the job search committee loved my unique imagery. They admired my style and combination of disparate elements into a one-of-a-kind artistic statement.
He then wanted to know who my influences were and where my influences came from. He said that the committee had a hard to placing me in a continuum of styles and artists because I didn’t really fit any directly.
I explained the best I could but also mentioned that the influences were indirect in most cases and not a case of me directly developing my style from an immediate predecessor. He liked that answer but I didn’t get the job. There were a lot of reasons going into me not getting it I am sure. But I do think they weren’t comfortable with that element that made it hard to place me.
That is the essence of the dilemma for the artist.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily.
“You do not merely want to be considered the best of the best. You want to be considered the only ones who do what you do.” – Jerry Garcia, 1942-1995, musician
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 24, 2009 | Christmas |
My mother loved this song “Mele Kalikimaka’ (Hawaiian for Merry Christmas). It became the thing we would say upon talking to or seeing any family member at the Christmas holiday.
She started it because we moved back east where it was cold and snowy, while her best friend, Betty stayed in San Diego. Betty would rub it in when calling by reminding my mom of how nice and warm it was in California by singing part of that song. It became the family greeting after that.
My mother was a huge Christmas fan, always crying with joy when her kids came home for the holidays. I didn’t cry but I certainly am filled with love and joy to have my eldest, Beka, home this year along with most of the family. Maybe another year it will be everyone.
I wish all of you a love-filled Christmas. If you aren’t with your family I hope you are feeling loved and are loving whoever it is you are with.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 23, 2009 | Ogden Nash |
A cannon would say that, wouldn’t it.
Who is a cannon in your life, not wanting messages of love and compassion to get in the way of the job of destruction that must be done?
Give them a big dose of December 25th this year!
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“People can’t concentrate properly on blowing other people to pieces if their minds are poisoned by thoughts suitable to the twentyfifth of December.” – Ogden Nash, 1902-1971, American Poet
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 22, 2009 | Burton Hillis, Christmas |
There it is, my answer for the reason for the season.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“The best of all gifts around any christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.” – Burton Hillis (pen name for William E. Vaughan) American Writer
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 21, 2009 | Self, Thomas a Kempis |
As Professor Higgins says in ‘My Fair Lady, ‘Why can’t a woman be more like a man?’ That is a sexist version of what so many wish, that the people they deal with would be different than they are; less annoying, less hard to understand, less odd in the way they do things.
How often is that our first reaction because it is so much easier to desire that than to actually figure out, and implement, how we can change instead.
Not just because we have areas we would like to change, but also so we have a better reaction to those around us. So everyone else isn’t an annoyance, but is just another person to try to understand, like we hope they would try to understand us.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.” – Thomas A’Kempis, 1380-1471, German Priest and Theologian
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 21, 2009 | Idealism - 2013, Winston Churchill |
A vintage napkin from 2004.
Intolerant idealism is the sin of both the extreme left and the extreme right.
Our Associate Pastor gave a sermon titled ‘Are You Expecting’ about advent and the season of expecting the divine to arrive.
She talked about her mother choosing to always love her in spite of some very unexpected directions she took in life. She used that as an example of how to have expectations but also keep a loose hold on them, since you can never be in control of enough of live to be assured of one particular outcome.
She closed her sermon with the announcement that she is expecting, she is pregnant. She then gestured for her partner, Jill, to stand so people would know who she is.
I don’t know what her mother’s religion or belief system was or is. But if she was like most parents it likely came as a surprise to know her daughter was lesbian. If you are a parent it would probably turn a couple of your beliefs upside down. But what would you do? Would you condemn, thinking that the condemnation is the only way to remain true to your beliefs, or would you accept and embrace, finding a way to be true to your beliefs while still showing love to them?
I can tell you this, if you chose the intolerant idealism route you would lose your daughter. You would have your self-righteousness intact, but you would not have her with you. You wouldn’t have that granddaughter. You wouldn’t have those birthdays and holidays and events with them. And for what? For an idealism that you disproved with your actions. That is a good definition of folly to be sure.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism.” – Winston Churchill
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 19, 2009 | Clyde Moore, Winter - 2009, 2011 |
Here is an uplifting, inspirational message about snow for all my east coast friends who are having a blizzard dumped on them right now.
Yes, your lawn is now as pretty as the neighbors’. Well, unless you count your car on cinder blocks, and the old transmission next to the flat tractor tire. Those still look like what they are, even under snow. But they are prettier versions, so that counts for something. Not much, but something.
Of course, the anal lawn people get upset at Mr. Snowmaker because their lawn, and by extension their very soul, isn’t obviously superior to the junk man that lives next door.
Ignore those persons. They reheat little vienna weenies for dinner and watch the weather channel 24/7. They would mow their snow if they could.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“There is one good thing about snow, it makes your lawn look as nice as your neighbors.” – Clyde Moore
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 18, 2009 | John Kenneth Galbraith |
Nothing explains the current dilemma in America better than this quote. It is about weight, food, obesity and the diseases that go along with them, but it isn’t just about that.
In my mind excess and plenty isn’t a bad thing. The bad thing is what your mind tends to do when you have excess and plenty. What my mind tends to do is worry about keeping it all. About sustaining that world of excess. About making sure we have plenty.
But what I want my mind to do is think about those I come in contact due to that excess and plenty.
I want to worry less about the food I eat and more about being kind to the waiter who brought it.
I want to worry less about the stuff I am giving away to the local charity and worry more about being respectful and caring to the person who helps take it out of my car.
I want to worry less about thinking how some object of beauty I possess will impress others and more about how that same object can be a delight to others.
I want to worry less about the value of my possessions and more about who helped me possess them in the first place.
I want to worry less about enjoying my vacations and more about creating a vacation others will enjoy as well.
When I am in that place I am happy. It’s then that my mind, in spite of or because of any excess and plenty I have, will be focused in the right direction.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“More die in the U.S. of too much food than of too little.” – John Kenneth Galbraith, 1908-2006, American economist and author
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 17, 2009 | Francis Picabia, Self |
This is a bit of a companion piece to the one yesterday about worrying about what others think of you.
Remember two things. If they are talking about you negatively behind your back they deserve the arse treatment.
If they are talking about someone else behind their back and want you to join in, protect yourself and honor the person not present by giving them the arse treatment.
See them for who they are. They are damagers (yes, I just made that word up) because they are damaged. They work desperately to find a way to make the world in their damaged image instead of changing themselves to a less damaged self. They deserve your compassion and help but not at the expense of your ethical and social safety.
Now, of course this sounds self-righteous talking about ‘they’ as if I, you, never gossip, never talk behind other peoples’ backs. We do. So, start to look around you. If you see a lot of arses you might need to reconsider your own way as well!
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“My arse contemplates those who talk behind my back.” – Francis Picabia, 1879-1953, French artist and poet. He contributed to the evolution of impressionism, cubism, fauvism, dadaism and surrealism.
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 16, 2009 | George Santayana, Self |
How many times has this happened to you? You are cruising along, feeling fine about yourself, your life, your career, when you hear someone say something negative about you and your day (and maybe week) just goes to crap.
I hate it when that happens! I especially hate it when I get all mopey and depressed about something they said that I ALREADY KNOW IS TRUE! It’s as if I think I am hiding it from everyone else and now that it is out I have to realize it all over again about myself.
My unfather-in-law, Dwight Johnson and I couldn’t have been more different one from another. Where I was extroverted and opinionated, he was introverted and diplomatic in discussions. Where I was artistic and distracted he was logical and focused. Where I was a ‘bad boy’ with innuendo humor and a flirtatious streak, he was a straight arrow and wouldn’t know how to flirt if Marilyn Monroe landed in his lap.
The reason I mention this is that I was a relentless teaser of Dwight in the early years of our relationship. It wasn’t hard to do. But his response was always in good humor. It’s as if he knew my teasing, my comments about his habits, his attitudes, etc. weren’t about him. They were about me. His stock response, the response I am now recommending you take, is simple and easy to remember. He used to say ‘I just consider the source’.
So, consider the source. Not just to understand the comment in it’s proper place, but to also be understanding of the person who said it, their weaknesses and eccentricities and insecurities that led them to say something like that.
By the way, Dwight eventually became the most important male adult in my life. I learned more from him about how to be a good husband, father and man than any other single person. I didn’t learn the lessons very well, I flunked many times, but nonetheless it was his example, and his good humor with me, that gave me much of what I deem of highest value in who I became.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“What others think of us would be of little moment did it not, when known, so deeply tinge what we think of ourselves.” – Santayana, 1863-1952, Spanish Aphorist and Philosopher
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 15, 2009 | James Chartrand, Sir Walter Scott |
Yesterday I read a story from a writer and blogger named James Chartrand. He wrote an article on his blog titled ‘Why James Chartrand Wears Women’s Underwear‘. In the article he proceeds to explain that, contrary to his name and persona online and in business for the last three years, he is a she.
She then goes on to tell the story of how that came about. It includes being in a desperate situation financially, possibly being on welfare with 2 kids to feed.
Her solution, was to turn to the internet where she became a writer under her own name. Business wasn’t great and she decided to use a pen name that would allow her separation from her struggling company. As an experiment she decided to use a ‘male’ name.
I will let you read her story from there if you want to. It will include why she had to ‘come out’ and then a gazillion comments after her story (including a number of my own. Find them and I will give you a prize, maybe).
It got me thinking about deception and lying and when it is ok or not ok. Most of the comments in her story are very supportive of her, basically blaming the sexism in this country (which I am not discounting) for her dilemma. But it wasn’t just a name change, it included a whole new brand identity – her company is called ‘Men With Pens’ and has a macho looking header with a bullet coming through it, and a series of methods to avoid being found out by her clients, including never talking on the phone to them, and of course having all money transactions being through the company name, not her made up male name.
It is an interesting read and I recommend you take some time to do so when you have a chance. I would love to know what you think so come back here after you are done and comment, ok?
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.” – Sir Walter Scott, 1771-1832, Scottish Author
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 14, 2009 | Les Coleman, Travel |
At first I think, how pathetic – this stupid goldfish swimming around in circles going nowhere. But as an analogy how different is it from our own lives?
We are trapped on the earth, we aren’t going anywhere (well, except for the 20 million I am going to pay to go up in a rickety Russian spaceship, but besides that). Whether we travel all around the globe or barely make it out of our town, we still are contained by something.
The breakdown in the analogy is that we can change the size and look of our bowl while the goldfish can’t. But, in truth, we do not do that unless we feel some unmet need. Even then often times we will suffer with an unfulfilled dream or hope and not take the steps necessary to expand or change our bowl.
What is your bowl? Are you satisfied with it? Do you have the courage to reshape your bowl to encompass the world you want to swim in?
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“The distance a goldfish swims is not controlled by the bowl.” – Les Coleman (no relation), 1945-not dead yet), British guy
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 13, 2009 | Kurt Vonnegut |
Here is a vintage napkin from 2004, given to my daughter, Chelsea, close to the last day of her senior year in high school.
One of the most amazing things about watching kids grow up is seeing them trying on different personas to see how they fit. The ones they will try on first and most often are those of their parents obviously. But they will try on their friends’ and teachers’ as well. Eventually what started out as a series of ‘pretendings’, of ‘acting adult’ will coalesce into part of who they become.
Some will have those variations close to the self they are really comfortable with, others will have those roles take over and become them, even if it isn’t anywhere near their true soul.
I wanted Chelsea, and all my daughters, to know that what you pretend, or practice, is what you will become so choose your role models and your roles carefully. Let them be true to the real self inside you.
For those of us who are well past high school and the pretending we did once is now a person we hardly know the only thing to say is to start practicing the real you now. If you don’t know who that real you is, then pick something fun, that makes you smile and play with that. If you do, the real you will come out.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“We are what we pretend to be.” – Kurt Vonnegut, 1922-2007, American Author
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 11, 2009 | Kahlil Gibran |
Or perhaps it is a truth that is laughing too hard. Or a truth that is trying to hide something. Or a truth that has size issues. Or a truth that only wants to help. What do you think an exaggeration is?
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“An exaggeration is a truth that has lost its temper.” – Kahlil Gibran, 1883-1931, Lebanese-American writer and poet
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 10, 2009 | Ralph Marston |
Why do I have someone washing dishes in this drawing? Because how clean your dishes are is a result of attitude, not skill.
Not to say you shouldn’t teach your children the proper way to wash dishes, but if you never taught them chances are they would figure it out on their own, right?
It is SO EASY to settle into a ‘good enough’ frame of mind. In many areas that is acceptable. Sweeping the garage can be done ‘good enough’. But in most cases ‘good enough’ is really another way of saying ‘I’m lazy’. I don’t want to work that hard to reach excellence. I want to just do the minimal and be done with it.
I have had that attitude before, and sometimes I still have it. It doesn’t go away.
So, how do you increase this attitude of excellence? It seems to me you have to think it makes a difference. It might make a difference to your pride at the Christmas dinner if your plates are caked with bits of food from Thanksgiving, right? In that case it is worth doing an excellent job cleaning your dishes.
What about at work? Does it really matter if you get the work in on time or a day late? What if the boss doesn’t seem to care, why should you? Does it really matter if you spell check and proof read or not? Who is going to notice anyway, right?
Here is the key. The truth is it matters because what you do, defines YOU. It doesn’t first define the company or the family or the holiday or the client, but you. It affects those people and institutions and that is important, but no family reputation, no company brand identity and no sales association is ever going to have a definition without its individual members having their identity first.
If you are a ‘good enough’ person, and your boss is, and your son and daughter are, and your sales associates are, then you find yourself living in a good enough world. So you ask, what’s wrong with that? What’s wrong with it is that you have 50 other companies being excellent that are kicking your ass in the business world. Your son or daughter have thousands of fellow students kicking their ass being excellent at school. You have rival sales people kicking your ass getting the sales you aren’t getting. That isn’t just the rear end they are kicking. They are kicking your wallet, your company, your chances for success, your opportunities for the future as well.
I have to recharge myself with this attitude frequently. I tend to slide into the ‘good enough’ world really easily. Truly it is the #1 reason I am the Napkin Dad, to inspire myself to be excellent as well as communicate it to others.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“Excellence is not a skill, it is an attitude.” – Ralph Marston, still alive, author of The Daily Motivator
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 9, 2009 | Heart - 2010, Kelly Diels, Lianne Raymond, Marty Coleman |
Via a tweet from Julie Roads of ‘writingroads‘ that mentioned a blog named ‘Cleavage‘ by Kelly Diels that mentioned a quote within a conversation with Lianne Raymond that was rolling around in her head for 10 days I got part of this quote. I added the ‘every day’.
What is dying to be born in you? When is your due date? Is it perhaps overdue? Should you perhaps induce labor?
The pain of giving birth to this thing will be far outweighed by the love that will come from fulfilling your dreams.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“Every day something is dying to be born in you.” – Lianne Raymond, Kelly Diels and Moi
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 8, 2009 | Scott Adams |
This is a cynical quote I know, and I am usually not a cynical guy. This quote is also a pretty accurate observation about the lengths to which we humans will go to feel secure. When I say ‘feel secure’ I am not talking about actually being secure. I am talking about having the hope, the assumption, the desire for security all wrapped up with the methods to get that security.
Who doesn’t pursue it? It is a rare individual. But there are differences among people who nonetheless reside in close proximity to one another in socio-economic levels. One person takes losing a lover in stride and moves on, the other goes over the top and becomes a stalker. One person lives and breathes by the lottery numbers, another plays it and forgets they even have the ticket a day later. One person lives with guilt all day everyday and the worry of eternal salvation that may or may not result. Another person feels guilty but doesn’t worry about the afterlife.
Why is this? What drives us in our fears and thoughts? How do we grow into the best understanding of ourselves and our world and behave accordingly?
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily blog
“Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating and religion.” -Scott Adams, 1957-not dead yet, American Cartoonist – Creator of Dilbert
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 7, 2009 | Irish Proverbs |
I love my daughters.
Chelsea wrote an article about our relationship for Mia Magazine. I am proud of her skill in writing it and grateful she saw me as being helpful (overall) in her growing up years.
Mia Magazine (click on the magazine image at the bottom of the link page to read it. Go to ‘My Relationships’).
Drawing © Marty Coleman
“A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life.” – Irish Proverb
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 6, 2009 | Napoleon Bonaparte, Stupidity - 2001-2011 |
One of my pet peeves is conspiracy theories. This quote is why. The vast majority of things that happen in the world are not controlled by nefarious, evil-doers bent on world destruction (though some are).
Most are a result of a guy falling asleep at the wheel, a woman leaving a pot on to boil and then taking a nap, a government official signing the wrong thing in the wrong place, or the engineer transposing a number after an all-nighter trying to finish a project.
So, remember, the store return clerk is not out to get you, they are just not very good at their job, at least today. The wedding coordinator is not working to make yours a disaster, she just forget to write something down on her ‘to do’ list.
Give people the benefit of the doubt about their motives, but don’t hesitate to demand competence. The incompetent person doesn’t really want to be that way, they may not know how to do the job right, or might just be lazy and not have the ideals or vision for themselves they really would like to have. Be kind about your demand, but demand it nonetheless.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“Never ascribe to malice that which can be adequately explained by incompetence.” – Napoleon Bonaparte, 1769-1821, French General and Emperor
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 5, 2009 | Cynthia Heimel |
I was going to choose a quote on failure because I totally blew part of a photo shoot recently. It is embarrassing and I had to refund some money. I was angry at myself for not paying attention to details and for not being keeping my standards at the level I should.
But instead of beating myself up over it I decided I needed to just buckle down and be much more deliberate, much more ‘professional’. What that means for me is I need to leap into my endeavors with more respect for the entire set of skills and knowledge I need to have and work to attain and retain all those things.
I take creative leaps pretty regularly, it isn’t a thing I fear. But now I need to take a leap in another way and I need to realize it is the same leap. I need to commit to the leap, and prepare for the leap as best I can.
Do you know what I mean?
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“When in doubt, make a fool of yourself. It’s a microscopically thin line between ‘brilliantly creative’ and ‘gigantic idiot’ so, what the hell, leap.” – Cynthia Heimel, born sometime – not dead yet, American writer
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 4, 2009 | Art, Ralph Waldo Emerson |
I woke up early, around 5am (had to pee) and laid back in bed with thoughts of accomplishment in my head. I am not sure why but the question ‘what would you say is your greatest accomplishment’ came to mind. I envisioned it being asked by an interviewer as if I was on a morning talk show.
My first thought in response was this: My greatest accomplishment is continuing to be positive, confident and happy in spite of what life has thrown at me. Following right behind was the thought: My greatest accomplishment is continuing to be an artist most every day of my life.
Both revolve around knowing and being who I am, who I want to be. If I struggle with knowing and acting to be who I want, it is a struggle not to become someone else, but to adjust myself enough to fit in as I might need to fit in in certain circumstances. I am not always successful at that.
So, what about you? What is your greatest accomplishment? I am NOT talking about careers or how many kids you have or something like that. I am talking about your emotional, social and psychological accomplishments in life.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson, 1803-1882, American Philosopher and Essayist
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 3, 2009 | George Bernard Shaw |
This goes against the grain of the way I have thought about virtue in the past. But after I read this quote, and heard the ongoing stories about Tiger Woods and his infidelities, it made me reconsider.
I use to think the man or woman who wanted something bad or unhealthy but stood against the desire and didn’t indulge was being virtuous. I am not saying I completely disagree with that. They are virtuous in many ways.
It also glides into a perfect fit with the ideal of the rugged individualist who battles his or her demons and comes out victorious. It makes a good story in other words because really, what is more boring than a truly virtuous person, right?
But the quote really does bring out the idea that the KEY to being virtuous is not in battling your desire, but to not have the desire. Of course you might be saying, fine but how do you get RID of the desire? Isn’t that the billion dollar question! Think of all the industries that would go belly up if we got rid of the desire instead of spending our lives fighting the desire. The diet industry would lose a lot of financial weight. The tobacco industry would go up in smoke. Alcoholics Anonymous would have some problems keeping their glass full as well.
I do know in my own life I have only won the battles when the desire has left me. I had to reach a crisis point, a bottom, for that to happen with alcohol, which it did in 1993. But once I hit that bottom the desire left. If, however, you don’t have a revelation or event that stops the desire stone cold and it wants to stick around a while, the key to success over a vice is in large part a function of how much you feed it. Find something to replace it and stick with it. If you are an addictive personality, which you likely are if you struggle like that, then find another addiction! Become an exercise whore, or a furniture maker extraordinaire, find something and stick with it. And then let time work it’s magic and sweep the desire into the past.
Drawing and commentary © Marty Coleman
“Virtue consists, not in abstaining from vice, but in not desiring it.” – George Bernard Shaw, 1856-1950, Irish playwright
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Here is an illustration of how this works (at least for a male). 
