What She Wants – Travel Napkin
On the road in Texas thinking about beauty and goodness, selfishness and altruism.
How do you balance the tension between the two? Does one even need to worry about it?
Heroes vs Celebrities – Heroes Week #3
I hope I become a famous celebrity for posting Napkin #3 of Heroes Week!
Autographs, Please
I remember reading an article in Flying magazine once about my father. The article was about his exploits as a test pilot in the 1950s, for which he became quite famous. He was famous for a brief while among the general population and has had continued fame within the aviation community ever since. Still, to this day, I get regular inquiries and requests to interview him, visit him, have autographed photos of him sent. I sent one to Scotland a few years back.
Skeets Coleman (right) and engineer with the XFY-1 POGO
Legend in Residence
The article started out talking about how the author met my father. He met him when my father was hired to be Publisher of Business and Commercial Aviation Magazine. But that is not what the author said. He said he met him when my father was hired to be ‘Legend in Residence’ (or something close, the exact words escape me right now). I understand that when you are very high up in business they are often hiring your reputation, not just you. They wanted the cache of saying they had a legendary aviator at the helm. It gave their enterprise gravitas and authority. I get that.
Skeets Coleman and Jerry Brown
Skeets Coleman and Michael Bloomberg
Celebrity vs Substance
At the same time it did seem, in my eyes, to diminish his accomplishments during the rest of his career in aviation. He didn’t just fly one amazing test flight and then do nothing. He had also been a fighter/bomber pilot in WWII, an airport owner, a salesman of high end corporate jets, a corporal in the Marine Reserves, an inventor and innovator in aviation equipment and airplanes. And he was now at the helm of a very important and influential magazine in his industry. None of those things brought him the fame of his test pilot exploits, and rightly so. The test flights he took were legendary and they deserved to be. As a matter of fact, as the years past his flights are seen in higher regard not lower. The farther we get from the time of the flights the more amazing it seems his accomplishments were. But his other endeavors were valuable, good and worthy of recognition. They proved him to be a man of substance throughout his life, not just an aviation celebrity for one event.
Skeets Coleman on Johnston Island during WWII
Skeets Coleman (3rd on right, front row) and Squadron in WWII
I started this out not knowing it would turn into an essay about my father. But his life is the root of my personal understanding of both hero and celebrity. I like that he was both and I like that he always knew the difference.
XFY-1 POGO
Here is a 1955 promotional film that shows what exactly what it was that my father flew in the test fights I have been mentioning. I think you will be impressed.
Ink vs Blood – Heroes Week #2
I am writing it down: Today is day #2 of Heroes Week at the NDD!
Irish Proverb
What makes a hero?
Is it the one who faces physical violence or danger? Indeed, those are the first we think of when the word ‘hero’ comes up. But perhaps heroes aren’t just those who are the victims of violence. Perhaps they are also those who are the victims of intellectual and creative oppression and persecution. Perhaps they are both.
One of the most well-known examples is Galileo, who proposed that the earth revolved around the sun. He was under house arrest for the rest of his life and his academic career was ruined due to the church’s opposition to his discovery. In spite of this he continued to produce scholarly material that moved science forward. He is today commonly understood to be one of the founders of modern science. It took the Catholic Church 350 years to say they made ‘errors’ in their judgment of Galileo.
Question of the Day:
Who are some other examples of intellectuals, scholars and artists who have been persecuted and oppressed only to have their work become creatively important to the world?
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote is an Irish Proverb
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How does ‘Hero’ happen?
My post last week about Coco Larrain had a great response (you can read it by taking a look at the ‘recent posts’ list over there on the right). Even though the word wasn’t used, a theme emerged about her being a hero, which I believe she is. But how and why is she, or anyone, a hero? That got me to thinking and I decided to investigate the idea a bit.
Here is day #1 of Heroes Week at the NDD.
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I love this quote. It rang so clear when I first read it. I suppose some heroes aren’t cornered. They seek out danger, they train for danger, and they respond as trained when the danger appears before them. Firefighters, police, rescue teams, front line soldiers all train for it and yes, they are heroes. But even then, with all their training, they must at some point face that tight spot and respond.
Most acts of heroism, those done by those not specifically trained, occur when there is no choice. One must either act heroically or something very bad is going to happen or is already happening.
I read recently about the very sad loss of a family in a tornado that hit Woodward, Oklahoma. The father was found with his 2 small daughters tucked beneath him. They all died but that didn’t mean his act was not heroic. It just means it wasn’t successful.
Another example that comes to mind are the passengers on Flight 93 on September 11th, 2001. Cornered on a jet by terrorists aiming for the US Capitol, they became heroes by fighting back and succeeding in thwarting their plans, at the cost of their own lives.
Give your fellow readers some of examples that you know of – those who were backed into a corner and responded heroically.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, who has had to learn many times he is not one.
Quote by Jim Belushi, 1954- not dead yet, American actor
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Artists I Love – Coco Larrain – Breast Week #4
Coco
Are you wondering why I am combining two series, ‘Artists I Love’ and the current ‘Breast Week’? Coco is the reason. She was the inspiration for Breast Week because she just recently had a mastectomy as a result of her second bout with breast cancer. Her first was 15 years ago. She also happens to be a life-long artist.
Coco – 1972 High School Yearbook
A Long Time Ago
Coco went to school with me starting when I was about 13 until high school graduation 6 + years later. She was one of a handful of people in school who were designated, like I was, as ‘the artist’. Turns out, now that so many of us are reconnected via social media, we realize our school (Darien High School in Darien, Connecticut) produced a prodigious amount of amazing artists, but back then some already had shown such talent that there was no doubt they were and always would be an artist. Coco was at the top of that list.
Alas, as often happens after high school, I lost track of most everyone, including Coco. I moved back to California where I was born and it made keeping connected pretty hard. It was long before social media and unless you called or wrote a letter it wasn’t going to happen.
Cape Cod
Fast forward many decades and my family is going on vacation to Cape Cod and Boston. I post a note on Facebook letting my friends on the east coast know that I am coming their way and ask them who I may know on the Cape. Coco’s name comes up. I connect with her after 30+ years and find, no surprise, that she is still a practicing artist.
Linda, Caitlin and I made it to Cape Cod and I was able to visit Coco in the summer of ’09. It was the first time I had seen her since we graduated from high school. She was busy with some commissioned paintings and contemplating a kitchen demolition and remodel. It was great to see her and her fantastic place.
Coco’s backyard
Coco – 2009
Coco’s Art
I also found that she had breast cancer more than a decade earlier and that she painted a series of self-portraits during that time.
Inner Child Prays – Self-portrait
Coco’s self-portraits – displayed in her home
The paintings are powerful in color and emotion, but diverse in feeling and depth. It’s like seeing someone they way they see themselves, a rare gift we don’t often get to experience. She does what the best artist’s do: she exposes herself with emotional courage.
Coco at Her Opening – Photo by Steven Specht
She also has done amazing work in landscapes, portraits, and collages. Here is a selection.
Landscapes
Above All Else – 2007
Kehoe’s Dune – 2007
Kehoe’s Dune – close up – note the hint of a home behind the dunes
The Painted Whale
Coco Larrain – Painted Whale – 2005
Painted Whale – in progress
Drawings and Paintings
Coco Larrain – Ishmael’s Wisdom
Woman with Red Gloves
Collages
Cat and Bird Games – collage
Moth and Apple – collage
Cancer
Coco found out recently that she had breast cancer again. She is facing it with the same incredible endurance and creativity she faced it last time. She is embarking on a portrait series of her self once again. This time she is enlisting the help of a very talented photographer, Julia Cumes, to document her journey. Check out Julia’s blog, Apertures and Anecdotes, to read about her interactions with Coco as they have completed the photo sessions so far.
Coco Before Surgery – Photograph by Julia Cumes
I am so looking forward to seeing how her courage and creativity will push her, and us, forward into fantastic and profound moments of art. If you would like to explore more of Coco’s work, you can see it at her website, Coco’s Artwork.
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Fall/Winter 2016
Winter/Spring 2015
Summer 2014
Winter 2012/2013
- Week #5 – Francisco Goya
- Week #4 – Robert Irwin
- Week #3 – Veruschka
- Week #2 – Albrecht Durer
- Week #1 – Roger Brown
Winter 2011/2012
- Week #10 – Coco Larrain
- Week #9 – Nina Levy
- Week #8 – Andy Goldsworthy
- Week #7 – Wayne Thiebaud
- Week #6 – Richard Diebenkorn
- Week #5 – Roy Lichtenstein
- Week #4 – Thomas Hart Benton
- Week #3 – Edward Hopper
- Week #2 – Henri Matisse
- Week #1 – Rembrandt
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Modesty, Breasts and the Nobler Virtues – Breasts Week #3
With all due modesty, it is day #3 of Breast Week!
This quote led to way more questions than answers for me.
I don’t think the author was talking about actual the female bosom. I believe it was originally meant symbolically, not literally. But I can see the meaning being expressed just as well, even better in some ways, when it is read as if referring to real breasts.
So, with that in mind, here is what I think it’s getting at: A woman being immodest about her breasts is lacking noble virtues, otherwise modesty would reside within her and she wouldn’t be flaunting them. Is that what you think it is basically saying?
Here’s the problem. How do we know when someone is being modest or immodest? Can 2 friends on vacation wearing very similar bikinis be different in that regard? Can one be modest and the other immodest with the exact same amount of flesh showing? How would we know the difference between them?
The quote suggests you would know the answer by the appearance of the ‘nobler virtues’ in the modest person. My question is, What are the nobler virtues?
And finally, the ultimate question in this regard:
Can a nudist be modest?
Click here to see the whole ‘Breast’ series
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Drawing and all these questions by Marty Coleman
Quote by Oliver Goldsmith, 1730-1774, Anglo-Irish writer
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Skin is Not Sin – Breast Week #2
Open Air
Why do we think skin equals sin? Why is the exposing of skin seen as dirty? Obviously in breastfeeding a mother shows her breast. If she is in public she might cover her breast with a blanket. But it’s also possible that she might choose not to cover, maybe because the child gets fussy under the blanket, maybe because she likes to watch her child nurse, maybe she likes the feel of the open air. Whatever her reason and whatever her choice there will be someone who feels it’s wrong, dirty or rude for her to nurse in public, no matter what.
It’s Your Fault
This gets to the heart of a persistent idea. It’s the idea that the woman is to blame for the actions of the man. It usually boils down to one thing, she showed too much skin. Whose fault is it if a man reacts rudely, even violently to a woman showing ‘too much skin’? In this persistent idea it is the woman’s fault. Why? Because you can’t expect a man to be able to control himself in the face of that much skin showing.
Self-Control
I, as a man, am offended by this the same way a woman would (and should) be offended by a comment saying a woman can’t control her emotions so she can’t be trusted in important roles in public life. The same is true with the ‘skin’ argument for men. It is not the case that men can’t handle it. It is the case that when men SAY they can’t handle it they are using it as an excuse for their own bad behavior. They are rationalizing their inability to have some self-control by blaming it on others. It’s not the ‘other’ who is to blame. It is the man.
Click here to see the whole ‘Breast’ series
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote is my variation on ‘Skin does not equal sin’ – anonymous
Breasts vs Boobs – Breasts Week #1
A number of friends of mine are currently battling Breast Cancer. Many more have battled it in the past. I will address the cancer side of breasts in my artwork soon but in the meanwhile it got me thinking not just about cancer but about breasts in general. I thought I would do a series investigating how we use the idea and the reality of breasts in our lives; corporate, individual, commercial, political, literary and emotional.
BREASTS IN POLITICS
I thought this quote was pretty funny. Good wordplay combined with a strong political statement. And it’s an understandably alluring idea; that the key to success in a political endeavor is to bring in people who have not been properly represented and who offer a different way of viewing issues than the powers who have been in control.
But the truth is having breasts isn’t a good reason to vote for someone because having breasts doesn’t stop people from being boobs. In my home state of Oklahoma we have a number of women in power, and, in my opinion, many of them are damaging women’s progress in the world, not furthering it. Fair representation matters, yes. But having breasts isn’t the deciding factor in good governance. What matters is ideas and execution of those ideas, whether one has breasts or not.
But I do agree the boobs have got to go!
Click here to see the whole ‘Breast’ series
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Claire Sargent, former candidate for US Senate from Arizona, 1992.
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A Poem About Her Self – Visual Poem #4
A spring weekend series highlighting selections
from my new Photo-collage project ‘Visual Poems’.
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Photo-collage by Marty Coleman
Model – Carrie Salce
4/8/2012 – A Poem About Her Shoulders – Visual Poem #1
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Round Peg, Square Hole – Marriage Week #5
I am going to make it fit because it’s day #5 of Marriage Week!
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What do you pay attention to in your marriage, what you have in common or what you don’t?
How do you fit the circle into the square? And yes, I know there is sexual innuendo, duh. Talk about that if you want but it ain’t all there is to talk about, right? RIGHT?
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Drawing and questions by Marty Coleman, who likes bright blue eyeshadow (but not on himself)
Quote by Leo Tolstoy, which I mispelled first as ‘Tolstory’ and thought that would be a funny take off on Toy Story, don’t you?
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How To Become a Philosopher – Marriage Week #4
Philosophically speaking, it’s day #4 of Marriage Week!
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It can be interesting and fun to be a philosopher, but it’s more fun and can be very interesting to be happy. Choose wisely. If you already chose and ended up with a bad one, give us your philosophy in one sentence.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Socrates, who was quite the philosopher
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The Marriage Blossom – Marriage Week #3
Well, if it ain’t the bloomin’ day #3 of Marriage Week at the NDD!
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The Defensive Marriage
I am in the middle of a conversation right now about a friend’s defensiveness on her blog and in her marriage. Here is Monica’s blog entry so you’ll know what I am talking about. I found the quote above as I typed out a response and it occurred to me that defensiveness only comes about when you perceive an enemy.
If you are defensive in your marriage you might be perceiving a real threat, like an abusive spouse, in which case you are smart to be in the defensive posture. But what if you aren’t perceiving a real threat, but are simply being defensive out of habit? Perhaps being defensive in the face of a false threat might cause your spouse to respond defensively as well. And then what happens? Then you are no longer on the same side and it’s very unlikely that your marriage will blossom sinces it’s a pretty hard task to love an enemy, real or imagined.
So, the solution is to be vulnerable and not defensive. But doesn’t that bring it’s own problems? When you are vulnerable, don’t you risk being taken advantage of, exploited, treated unfairly? Isn’t that a threat worth protecting against? Yes, it is. But you have to decide when that risk of exploitation is likely or unlikely and adjust to that reality, not just implement a learned behavior of defensiveness that is no longer an effective response to your current life.
You have to be on the same side if you want your love to blossom.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, who is preaching to himself, as usual.
Inspiration from the writings of Monica Bielanko
Quote by Tom Mullen
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How to Start A Fire – Marriage Week #2
I am burning to tell you it’s day #2 of Marriage week!
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Making Fire
A friend of mine, Natalie Tucker and her husband, from Glenelg, South Australia, recently went ‘glamping’ as she calls it, meaning camping without the roughing it. Even though I am not sure they had a fire and I AM sure it wasn’t out in the woods like the drawing even if they did (I saw a picture, they had a lawn at their campsite) hearing of their adventure made me connect when I found this quote about marriage. The end of the quote (which I didn’t include because it seemed obvious) compares the well built fire, with it’s closeness and it’s distance, to a well built marriage, which needs the same combination.
I also recently had a conversation with a friend who mentioned another friend who is considering divorce, the reason being that she has grown in directions, and in ways, that her husband hasn’t and/or doesn’t seem to understand or support. Her changes have led to them growing apart. I hear about this happening all the time and the one constant always seems to be not growing together. It’s not because they are doing different things, having different hobbies. It’s because they aren’t sharing those things with each other. It could be they are hiding something. They perhaps are afraid of a negative reaction. The other person might actively reject hearing about it. Or it could be they just forget to talk about things and before you know it they are so far down a road it seems impossible to backtrack and let the other person in on it.
It’s not an easy situation to be in and I certainly don’t think there is a simple solution. But at it’s essence, a relationship is about communication. If you aren’t interested or willing to communicate about who you are and the life you lead, then there is a pretty good chance you will have an empty marriage or no marriage at all.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, who last went camping in 2002.
Quote is my variation on one by Marnie Reed Crowell, 1939 – not dead yet, American writer
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The Ideal Wife – Marriage Week #1
It’s the IDEAL time to start a series on Marriage, don’t you think?
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Perfect. Ideal. Two words that marriage quickly eviscerates. But marriage doesn’t really do anything, does it. The people in the marriage do the eviscerating. They are the ones that, after a while, act without gratitude for their mate. They are the ones that forget the positive things their mate brings to their world. They are the ones that start to imagine greener grass. Then what is they usually find if they go off to that new plot of lawn? They discover it isn’t all that greener after all.
Why is that? What is it we have lost when the wife or husband no longer seems ideal? There are all sort of reasons, some I would think are valid, some I would think are not. But it isn’t up to me to decide another marriage’s fate. It’s up to me to discern what I might do within my marriage to become a husband closer to my wife’s ideal. Maybe I can come close, maybe I can’t. But I certainly won’t get very close if I am not paying attention to her and her wishes and desires for a mate, for her life.
I don’t think I am particularly good at that. But I am starting to realize it is as much or more about me and what I do than it is about her and what she does. Why is that? Because I can’t control my wife. I can’t make her my ideal, I can’t make her better or funnier or happier. I can’t change her. I can however work on those things in myself. Maybe I succeed, maybe I don’t. But if I pay attention to what I can do, then who knows who I can become. An ideal husband? Probably not. But a man moving in that direction? I bet most wives would take and keep that mate in a heartbeat.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, married 25 years over two marriages.
Quote by Booth Tarkington, which I think is a funny name.
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A Poem About Her Shoulders – Visual Poem #1
I recently started a new collage series called ‘Visual Poems’ and thought I would post them here on the weekends for a while.
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Freedom FROM the Press – ‘It’s The Law!’ week #3
ALERT THE MEDIA! It’s day #3 of ‘It’s The Law!’ week at the NDD!
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I read a great article this morning by a writer friend I haven’t ever met, Monica Bielanko. She writes for a celebrity oriented website and has been struggling with the issue of reporting on celebrity’s children. It got me thinking about the current state of affairs in our media culture and this is what I wrote in response to her article. Go read the article if you have time, it’s worth it. It gave me a great deal of respect for Monica.
Snarky judgment is the single worst cultural development of the last 20 years and I hate it. I know both have been around forever but we as a culture have embraced it and made it hip and cool in the past few decades. It’s not hip, it’s not cool. It’s sophomoric, it’s mean-spirited, and it’s demeaning to both the speaker and the object of the attention.
Any ongoing attitude you have in life, good or bad, is sort of like a chronic disease. It will increase and change into something fatal. If you focus on loving, forgiving, being compassionate and kind, you become more of those things over time. You end up being one of those fantastic grandparents that has more love than you can possibly comprehend someone having. If you focus on being sarcastic (even if it is funny, which much of it is) judgmental and purposely get a kick out of inflicting pain on others then you will end up being mean, bitter, hurtful and angry at the world. I choose the former set of attitudes to work on and pay attention to in others.
What do you think of the current media world we live in? Do you watch certain shows you actually hate yourself for watching? I watched both The Soup and Fashion Police for quite a while. I have stopped watching both because the judgment and mean-spiritedness was not what I wanted to pay attention to. Anyone want to produce a positive version of Fashion Police? I will watch it in a second!
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, who wants to be a kind old grandpa one day.
Quote by Mark Twain, who was if I remember correctly.
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It’s All About The Teeth – ‘It’s The Law!’ week #2
I am biting my lip knowing it’s day #2 of ‘It’s The Law!’ week at the NDD!
It makes for some pretty useless laws at times. It does seem that laws are often passed for the egos of the legislators more than the needs of the citizens. As a result, when there are teeth to the law they seem like dentures, easily removed and put on the night stand.
Law Trivia Question:
What is the basic difference between libel and slander? Answer tomorrow if you don’t get it first.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, who was once caught stealing gum in 9th grade.
Quote by Anonymous, who has been arrested for many, many things over the years.
Bad Law Enforcement – ‘It’s the Law!’ Week #1
Make no mistake, ‘IT’S THE LAW!’ week at the NDD!
I read a quote* by Hillary Clinton this morning that made a lot of sense. It started me thinking about the law and next thing I know, voila, I am doing a law series.
So, here is a bad law idea. Kick out all 11 million illegal immigrants from the USA and send them back to Mexico and other locales. Some knuckleheads actually think that is a desirable and feasible plan. It’s not. How can we tell? Well, we could start with the logic of removing 11 million people all at once from all areas of society. It would sort of be a rapture situation, you know? Well, except probably there wouldn’t be any planes, trains and automobiles still moving without someone in control. But in essence it would do the same thing. The social, economic and relational damage to the US would be overwhelming if this were to happen.
But of course there are those who will argue all sorts of reasons my prognostication is not true. So, how do we find out? We enforce the bad law to the letter, kick them out and see the results first hand. Of course, by then it would be too late and the damage would be done and couldn’t be undone.
But we can look to a bad law example that was enforced with terrible results. That was prohibition. All the best of intentions turned out to be one of the worst social and economic disasters in the history of the US. And it was the enforcement that led to the repeal.
That is why bad and unworkable laws shouldn’t be passed in the first place and that is why it is important to pay attention to who it is you elect and what the hell they are doing on your behalf.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, who should have been a lawyer.
Quote by Abraham Lincoln, who was one.
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*
“In many places, including my own country, legal protections have preceded, not followed, broader recognition of rights. Laws have a teaching effect. Laws that discriminate validate other kinds of discrimination. Laws that require equal protections reinforce the moral imperative of equality. And practically speaking, it is often the case that laws must change before fears about change dissipate.”
Artists I Love – Nina Levy, Napkin Mom and More
Hello Napkin Kin!
This is an unexpected addition to my ‘Artists I Love’ series. I want to introduce you to a very special woman. Nina Levy contacted me a few months ago to express her appreciation for The Napkin Dad Daily blog. She explained that she also draws on napkins for her sons but she downplayed their value compared to mine. I went to look at her work and, of course, they were magnificent! Incredibly beautiful renditions of popular culture and personal images that are wonderful expressions of love for her children.
Screen capture from the New York Time blog article
I got a call from a reporter, Liz Robbins, at the New York Times this past week. She said she was doing an article about Nina and her napkin artwork and had been referred to me by Nina. Liz wanted a bit of background about me and my napkin drawings and I was included in the article towards the end as another example of someone working in Nina’s genre. What an exciting surprise to get the call and be included.
Here is the link to her Daily Napkin blog.
Screen capture of Nina’ blog.
As is the case with me, Nina leads a double life. She is a napkin artist for her sons at night, but a world class sculptor and photographer during the day. I went out to investigate that side of her and found she isn’t just a kindred napkin soul with me but a kindred artist as well. Check out the video below to hear her talk about her 2011 exhibition and you will be amazed.
Still from a gallery discussion of her exhibition
Not knowing of any napkin connection, I had seen her work from a distance earlier in the 2000s and was mightily impressed. She is the type of artist I just love. Visually compelling, emotionally courageous and intellectually deep. She is an artist of the very highest caliber, one of the great portrait artists working today.
Screen capture of Nina’s website home page
If you google ‘Nina Levy artist’ you’ll be able to see a huge array of her work over the years.
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Fall/Winter 2016
Winter/Spring 2015
Summer 2014
Winter 2012/2013
- Week #5 – Francisco Goya
- Week #4 – Robert Irwin
- Week #3 – Veruschka
- Week #2 – Albrecht Durer
- Week #1 – Roger Brown
Winter 2011/2012
The Napkin Dad