by Marty Coleman | Sep 28, 2012 | Texas, Travel, Travel Napkins |
I went to Dallas, Texas for a few days this week to visit my daughter. I did this drawing while at Starbucks one morning.
Haley Being Drawn
I hung out at Starbucks yesterday morning and did a drawing of a woman having what seemed to be a mentoring time with someone who might have been a family friend, maybe a past professor, who was helping her talk through career ideas. I drew her as they talked. She stayed on to work after the gentleman left. After I showed her the drawing a guy came up behind me and said how good the drawing was, how beautiful she was and how the drawing didn’t really do her justice. He went on about her beauty and the drawing and I had a feeling the double attention was making her uncomfortable. Knowing a guy had been drawing her was probably awkward enough, but another guy coming along and focusing on her looks as well was a bit too much. I gave her my card, told her where she could find the drawing later and went on my way. As I went outside, the guy who had said something about the drawing came up to me and said ‘we have the same taste in women.’ I simply said, ‘She is beautiful.’ and went on my way.
Paying Attention
It bothered me though that he would say that. It’s like my deeper appreciation of her was sullied by his shallow response. Then again, his comment wasn’t offensive really, or tacky, trashy or rude. It was just a pretty average male comment. But it bugged me nonetheless. I sat down at that table because I saw her there and was hopeful she would be there long enough to draw her. She was interacting with someone so she had her head up and I wanted to take advantage of that instead of another person who might have been looking down and a book or computer. I also was hopeful I would have time to get the person she was talking to into the drawing, which I did, just barely. And yes, I thought she was beautiful and I wanted to draw her because she was attractive and well manicured in hair, makeup and dress.
How I See
So, why did that guy bother me? Were the two of us that different? Is the fact that I used my time viewing of her by doing a drawing better than the other guy just staring and doing nothing? In the end, what I love about drawing or photographing people vs just staring blankly at surface ‘beauty’ is that in my creative act I feel I am discovering the person to a much deeper degree. I am seeing the outer shell, true. But I am also investigating, paying attention to the tones, shapes, colors, expressions, style, body language, feelings, etc. I am interpreting and exploring who the person is and how I see them. I am making something of the encounter. Something that says more than just ‘she’s pretty’.
At least that is how I see it. What do you think? Do you think I am any different than that other guy?
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Drawing by Marty Coleman at Starbucks on Greenville in Dallas, Texas
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 25, 2012 | Anonymous |
Happy Home, Unhappy Home
This is sometimes why home isn’t always the happiest place in the world. We go there to let off steam, to let pretenses and expectations fall. It’s where we can be ourselves. It is where we find out whether that self is really all that nice or not.
But what happens when you can’t be yourself at home? What if you have to hide some secret that would ruin your life if it got out? What if you can’t behave naturally due to another person in the home being judgmental or abusive or hurtful? It seems that when you are hiding, protecting yourself or fearful, that anxiety is going to come out somehow. Internalized it might become illness, addiction, self-loathing. Externalized it might become abusive, meanness or confusion. Whatever it becomes it will likely show itself in the home, and it won’t be pretty.
Are you able to be yourself at home?
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Anonymous
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 21, 2012 | Apelles, Judgment - 2013 |
Your Area of Expertise
What do we know? And what do we know we don’t know? That is key to successful (yes, successful) judgment. The problem is we think we know more than we know. Do I know shoes? I am not a shoe maker so I can’t judge the excellence of shoes in a technical sense. However, I am a long time shoe wearer and a shoe looker so I feel competent to judge in those areas. The problem is that can easily spill over into judging the technical construction of shoes, of which I know nothing. Obviously, if my shoes fall apart or I have some shoe needle still sticking out of the sole I can judge the making of that pair of shoes as being faulty. But that doesn’t mean I actually know what goes into making an excellent pair of shoes. But I sure can sound like I know if I get going.
Painting the world with Judgment
So, I don’t like this one particular pair of shoes. That then can translate into recommending to a runner I coach that they avoid that brand. All of a sudden I have taken a specific issue with one specific pair of shoes and painted an entire company with that judgment. That is how it goes in many things, isn’t it. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Judgment can’t, and shouldn’t, be avoided. But it should be implemented when you have knowledge, not when you are ignorant. If I hear enough stories of bad shoes coming from this one company then perhaps I have some reason to judge the company. but to just have a single isolated pair? Not such a good reason to judge anything bigger than that pair of shoes.
Paying Attention
One of the reasons I love going to museums is so that I keep up with my expertise. I can’t very well judge my own artwork, or others, if I am not practiced at viewing and exploring art work out in the world. If I want to be a helpful, competent judge for a fellow artist on whether a certain piece is up to snuff or not, don’t I have to have a good foundation AND a current, fresh understanding of art in the world? Otherwise what can I really offer?
Hip as Hip Can Be
It would be as if a man had never moved beyond his 1970s clothing style. Would you trust him to advise or help in judging your fashion choices? Probably not.
Or a woman who has never done her own make up and hair beyond the 80s style she used in High School and then felt competent to judge her friends attempt at contemporary hair or make up circa 2012. Would she be a trusted advisor and judge? No, she wouldn’t be.
Judgment requires both foundational knowledge and contemporary knowledge to be trustworthy.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Apelles, 4th Century BCE, Greek painter
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 20, 2012 | Judgment - 2013 |
Raising Kids and Others
One of the big elements of raising healthy kids and helping others grow up into adulthood is to help them understand the true nature of judgment. Kids learn about judgment early on. After all, school is actually more about judgment and placing people in slots of acceptability than it is about formal education.
Consider the Source
I mentioned a number of months ago that my ex-father in law, Dwight Johnson, passed away. I went to the memorial service and spoke briefly at the reception about what he meant to me. One of my favorite lines he used to say was, ‘I just consider the source.’ He was usually referring to me having said some sarcastic remark at his expense. It was his way of saying, ‘Marty’s judgment says way more about him than it does about me so I don’t worry about it.’ He was a wise man.
Are You Vulnerable?
I have a friend who is very, very modest. She is working through why that is, and basically it comes down to feeling vulnerable. Now, my definition of vulnerable is about being at a high risk of something bad happening. She feels that the bad thing that might happen is that someone might say something negative about her body. And the truth is, there is that risk. She is sensitive and it hurts when it happens, whether the person is a jerk commenting on her appearance or figure, or an innocent family member who isn’t even old enough to know how to hurt someone on purpose saying something funny in her bedroom as she changes into her work clothes. So, how does she overcome that? I would tell her to contemplate the napkin quote. Is the comment exposing something about the person saying it, not the person it is directed to? The first person can be blown off as a jerk, easy enough. The second person’s comment, while not being blown off in the same way, can be at least understood as not being purposely hurtful. And think about it, aren’t most judgments coming from one or the other, either a jerk meaning harm or an innocent meaning no harm? If that is the case, then the only ones you really need to worry about are the judgments in between.
The Judgments in Between
What judgments are in between? What judgments are left? Maybe ones you can contemplate and decide for yourself if you agree with them. For example, someone says, ‘That hairstyle makes your face look long.’ Consider it. Does it? Do you mind that it does? Do you see something you hadn’t realized before and maybe agree with? No, you don’t? Then easy enough, you disregard the judgment/comment and go on your way. You do agree? Then easy enough, next time you change your hairstyle you consider styles that don’t make your face look long. In other words, it really becomes your own judgment, your own observation. It’s no longer seen as something hurtful or mean or anything like that. It’s just an observation, neutral in judgment, that you can consider as if it were your own observation.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Anonymous
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 19, 2012 | Art, Censorship - 2012 |
I am going to sell you on the fact that today is #5 in my censorship series.
Back Door Censorship
I love when a quote gets me thinking about something in a completely new way. I had not really considered that creating a market for some things but not others, based on moral judgment, is a back door method of censorship. It’s really not about whether something can sell or not, it’s much more about the powers that be building a market world that only allows certain types of images, books, films, dance, songs, to be distributed and sold.
Here ye, Here ye, Judge Money Presiding
Think about the Ratings Board for Film in the US. What is that but a censorship bureau? I am not saying it’s necessarily a bad thing, but that it is a construction meant to limit the commercial viability of products they deem as ‘too much’ in one way or another. The stated goal of the Ratings Board is to help society know what they are about to see, whether it is appropriate or not. But it also is guaranteeing that any film rated NC-17 will not be distributed widely at all, thus making it’s commercial viability minimal. That isn’t just a by-product of the Ratings Board, it’s one of the main functions of the ratings board, albeit not publicly stated.
Profit within the non-profit
How does a non-profit organization, like a museum deal with this idea? They can’t say the paintings won’t sell, since they aren’t selling anything. But they can say the artwork won’t bring in people to the museum, that it will cause a controversy, that it will offend people, and the result of that? The museum will lose what? Money, that’s what. Now, most museums I have been to make some pretty courageous choices about exhibitions. But they also reject exhibitions because they are not ‘commercially viable’ for their institution, even though their institution is supposedly not commercial.
Basically, behind it all, and around it all, I think the power of money is a huge censorship device. What do you think of this idea?
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by David Mamet, American playright
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 18, 2012 | Anonymous, Censorship - 2012 |
The Dividing Line between Reasons and Rationalizations
Where is the censorship line drawn? Kate Middleton, Britain’s Princess of Cambridge, is photographed with her bare breasts showing while sunning one a private balcony one half mile from the nearest road in the south of France.
How does a person rationalize taking the photos and selling them for what we have to assume is millions of dollars? The photographer says, ‘I could see her through my lens so she obviously was not in a private situation.’ What about the idea that she doesn’t want photographs of her breasts to be shown to anyone, much less published and seen by millions of people. Does that count for anything, does that matter? Obviously it isn’t a persuasive argument to the photographer, to the agent selling the photos, to the publisher purchasing the photos or to the editor and writer arranging and captioning the photos. They know she doesn’t want those photos taken or distributed. So, what is their rationalization? They might say, ‘Well, if she didn’t want her breasts shown she shouldn’t have shown them’ What do you think of that argument? Did she show them to the world when she exposed them to the sun and air on that secluded patio? Was it her fault?
Everyday Modesty and the Mundane
A friend of mine here in Tulsa, a news anchor, is an extremely modest woman. She is livid that anyone would do this and that laws allow it in certain countries. She said she would die of photos like that of her were exposed. She says it is a private, intimate moment, not one to be shared. What do you think? Is being nude in and of itself an intimate state of being, no matter where you are and what you are doing?
Others I know say it is just no big deal. It’s not a scandal, it’s not a moral failing on her part, it’s not a embarrassment. It’s just a woman sunning topless in private. Big deal. She isn’t in flagrante delicto, she isn’t doing anything outlandish. She is doing something incredibly mundane and pretty boring. Laying down and sunbathing, hardly the most arousing of activities whether topless, bottomless or both. Her boobs are shown, alright already. Done. Next.
Blame
What do you think of this whole situation? Is it ok or not that the photos were taken, sold and distributed? Who is to blame for it happening? Does Princess Kate hold any blame?
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Drawing by Marty Coleman
Quote by Anonymous
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 17, 2012 | Censorship - 2012 |
I think it is appropriate that it is Censorship series #3
Disapproving but Indulging
Being a photographer who often photographs women I have made a habit of checking those who favorite or comment on my photographs on Flickr, where I show them for the most part. My rule is that if the person has a well balanced range of photographs, either their own or those they favorite, then I will not do anything. But if I find they have photos only of one type, primarily pornographic or fetishistic, then I will block them from seeing more of my work.
But what that means of course is I have to go look at their site and their favorites. And that in turn means I see those pornographic and fetishistic photos. And the truth? I can be hypocritical about it. I see immediately that I am going to block this person, but I also sometimes spend more time looking than I need to. Why do I do that? Because the images are exciting to look at, duh.
The Company You Keep
What is the alternative? Here are the questions I have thought through. If I believe my art and photography is not pornographic and is worth looking at, then maybe it doesn’t matter who favorites it. They might favorite some cheesy sex kitten porn image that I think is pretty trashy, but if mine is next to it, doesn’t mine shine through? Or is mine diminished due to the company it keeps? And the other question is if I allow my image to be in a gallery of images I find offensive, then aren’t I approving of those other images? Aren’t I telling my viewers that it’s ok if they follow threads and go to that other site?
50 Shades of Appropriateness
That is where I draw the line. If someone sees my image and collects it somehow, along with images I don’t like, but they keep it to themselves, there isn’t much I can do about it. But if they are going to put it for public view then I am going to censor it if I find its surroundings offensive. This might be similar to the written word, let’s say, 50 Shades of Grey, which is now a very popular book. We have a copy of it (given to me by my wife, as of yet unread) and it is on my nightstand. We live alone and all our daughters are grown women now. As a matter of fact we know one of them has read it. But I wouldn’t have it on the nightstand if they were still living at home and were teenagers or younger. I would censor myself so that what I had in public was appropriate for those who might see it. It isn’t a matter of approval, it’s a matter of appropriateness. if, upon reading it, whether I am aroused by it or not, if I find it bad, trashy, mean-spirited, or otherwise lacking, I will get rid of it because I won’t want it infecting my bookshelf. I will let you know what I decide in a later post.
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Drawing by Marty Coleman
Quote by Edward Anthony, 1895-1971, American writer
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 14, 2012 | Censorship - 2012, Henry Steele Commager |
Don’t tell me I can’t make today day #2 of my Censorship series.
"The fact is that censorship always defeats its own purposes, for it creates, in the end, the kind of society that is incapable of exercising real discretion."
Going Berzerk
The recent events regarding the anti-muslim film, the riots in the middle east, and our American conflict between first amendment principles, common sense and common decency have got me thinking, How and why do we censor ourselves? The reason I ask is that self-censorship really is the the art of exercising real discretion in life and it is quite important to becoming a mature adult.
Some live in a rule bound society where they have very little freedom of expression. As a result they don’t have much reason to learn self-censorship and self-discretion. When those rules are changed or abandoned, or they move to another land with less rules, it can be very hard for the person to stay within any bounds, since none of the restrictions they had before were necessarily theirs. They were put on from the outside. I am not saying everyone in a rule bound society goes berzerk with freedom when the rules are lifted, but there can be that danger.
Figure Drawing
Last night I did something I haven’t done in many, many years. I went to an open figure drawing session. What that means is you aren’t in a class being instructed, you are just being given access to a studio and a model in a group setting so you can draw as you please. I don’t think I have gone to an actual figure drawing session since before I moved to Tulsa in 1994. I have drawn from the figure here and there, but not in a group studio setting. It was great fun and very energizing and challenging for me. It engaged me in a very rigorous and serious period of time of seeing, evaluating, drawing and creating.
I decided since I was thinking a lot about censorship yesterday that I would do something different in my drawings. I decided I would censor myself and see what I could come up with. There were 2 twenty minute poses where I was able to arrange myself so that there were objects in between the model and me. I worked it out so I could see that she was nude but that she was also obscured in the areas most people see as most private. Then I started drawing. What I love about those sorts of challenges I give myself is that I almost always end up with something more original, unexpected and visually compelling that if I had not given myself the challenge.
Self-censorship #1
These were drawn at Philbrook Museum of Art, Tulsa, OK
Self-censorship #2
It was an added bonus that I learned after the class that the model was a friend of 2 of my daughters from their time in Tulsa. We had a good conversation in particular about one of them. I was very happy I went for the drawing and the new insight she gave about my daughter.
What do you think of these drawings and what are your thoughts on censorship in general?
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Drawings and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Henry Steele Commager, 1902-1998, American historian
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 13, 2012 | Mark Twain, Naked vs Nude - 2012 |
Nipplegate
The New Yorker posted a funny cartoon online this week. It was taken off Facebook by its censors because it violated the terms of service. The violation was that it showed ‘nipple bulge’. In truth it showed a cartoon Adam and Eve sitting down leaning against a tree. They were naked, as you might expect. The drawing had 2 small ink dashes for Adam’s nipples. Those weren’t violations. Then they had 2 ink dots for Eve’s nipples. Those were violations of the ban on ‘nipple bulge’ (their words, not mine).
Here are the offending and non-offending marks.
- Not Offensive
- Offensive
It is the height of absurdity and The New Yorker wrote their own blog post about it that I think you would get a kick out of.
NIPPLEGATE
Then FB reversed it’s decision and decided to allow the cartoon. The New Yorker however did not trust them and so posted an even more inflammatory and provocative cartoon. You can see it if you dare.
NIPPLEGATE – The Exciting Conclusion
I meanwhile, in support of The New Yorker, have posted my own offending marks. They are behind the tree in the drawing above.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Mark Twain
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 12, 2012 | Mae West |
I read a great article online about Decision Making in the New York Times Magazine this morning. It led me to today’s drawing and topic. I will link to the magazine at the bottom of the page.
It’s All Your Fault
If you only had more willpower. If you only learned to discipline yourself. If you only weren’t so spoiled, gluttonous, slothful, lazy, indulgent, selfish, stupid, immature and short-sighted. If only you had more glucose. WHAT? Glucose?
Well ok, it’s Your Brain’s Fault
Once again, science is making progress in understanding who we are, how we work and what we can do to improve. There has been a number of studies in recent years that go under the heading of Decision Fatigue and Ego Depletion. What do those terms mean? Decision fatigue is the phenomenon whereby each decision you make in a day diminishes your willpower and ability to make subsequent decisions. Your brain acts like a muscle in the sense that it gets tired after so much exercise that it really can’t work that well anymore. Ego Depletion is when your ability to retain your decision making skills at your ego’s normal level is diminished. That is why we tend to make bad decisions (or can’t make one at all) in the afternoon or evening, after a long day of decision making. But why is this? Well, research seems to be indicating that the reason is a depletion of glucose in the brain. Sugar basically. it doesn’t stop the brain from working, it just stunts the decision making areas of the brain.
Parole in the Afternoon
In a study of Israeli parole boards they found that being brought up for parole in the early morning, right after breakfast, the convict had a much better chance of recieving parole than a criminal with the same sentence for the same crime had if he came before the parole board late in the morning, before lunch, or late in the afternoon. In all these cases the difference was the board members inability to decide, not the individual merits of the cases. Why was that? Because they had already made so many decisions that the best, easiest decision was to make none at all. Leave the decision for another day was the best choice in their decision fatigued mind. And what made their mind fatigued in this way? Lack of glucose.
The Dieting Catch 22
So, how does this apply to dieting? Dieting is all about will power, right? It’s all about deciding again and again and again, not to eat certain foods. What does that insistent decision making do? It depletes one’s ego, the person’s ability to make decisions in their best interest. So, what is needed to restore that ability to make the right choice in dieting? Eating is what is needed. What to eat? Sugar. How is that for a catch 22?
1. In order not to eat, a dieter needs willpower.
2. In order to have willpower, a dieter needs to eat. *
Moral failure vs Brain Science
One of the best things about our paying attention to scientific discoveries is that it lessens judgment but increases our ability to change and grow. It is the search for the truth that can help us, and the old, simplistic moral condemnation is ineffective (and alway have been) because it doesn’t help us understand and act on what the real truth is. And the real truth is that we must pay attention to our biology, our chemistry, our cultural and social behaviors and analyse them not with ignorant condemnation but with neutral and effective judgment.
Judge Yes
Judgment of self is not condemnation of self. It is realizing that you are doing this one thing and, without condemning yourself, that can decide that you will change doing that one thing into doing another thing. The truth is you won’t be more effective (and more likely will be less effective) by dumping a truckload of guilt on yourself in the process. It’s not an excuse and it’s not a license to do something bad. It is just a more effective and positive way to pursue the change you want to see in your life.
Do You Suffer From Decision Fatigue? – New York Times Magazine 8/17/11
Let me know what you think of this.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Mae West
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 11, 2012 | American, Heroes - 2012, New York City |
9/11
In Memoriam
Total dead: too many
Total injured: too many
Total relatives and friends of the dead and injured: too many
Total military dead in subsequent wars: too many
Total military injured in subsequent wars: too many
Total relatives and friends of the war dead and injured: too many
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 10, 2012 | Uncategorized |
Banking on Care
I am not against bankers and I am not against banks. But I am against them saying they are one thing when they actually are another. Just like any other business, they, as a corporation, are not set up to care about you. They are set up to make money for their shareholders. That is what drives them and sustains their operations. If they don’t do that, the bosses lose their jobs and so do a lot of other people. That is how banks, insurance companies and other ‘service’ industry businesses work.
But what about when they say they care about you? The individuals in that bank or insurance company may indeed care about you for no other reason but that they do. But the company itself? It does not care about you in the same way. It cares about you as a paying customer, as a PR help, as a problem, as an easy mark, as a taker who isn’t making them much money, or any number of other designations. But the company itself doesn’t care about you.
Care in the Corner Office
The higher up the person in that company is, the less they can care about you. This is not because they are money grubbing capitalists. They might be giving away a ton of money to charity. They might be caring for their entire extended family. Then again, they might be money grubbing. But, even if the higher ups have a heart of gold, they are unlikely to care about you. Why? Because they don’t have contact with you. The higher up they are the more contact they have with the shareholders, not you. The shareholders care about you as a vehicle for them to make money. It sounds severe and cold and mean. But it isn’t. It’s just the way companies work.
Care is not a product
What matters isn’t if they care or not, it’s if the product they sell helps you or not. Their ads, their PR, their front man or woman in the branch office may all say we care, but since we aren’t naive enough to believe that, all that really matters is whether you are getting what you pay for. Pay attention to that and you won’t be under false expectations and let down when the truth comes out: they don’t care about you.
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Drawing by Marty Coleman
Quote by Mark Twain
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 7, 2012 | Naked vs Nude - 2012 |
Is It What It Is?
Do you investigate what you are afraid of? Do you purposely move towards it to find out what it is really all about? Read the story below for a great example.
The Naked Waitress and the Cop
Back in the 80s and 90s I taught beginning drawing and figure drawing at various community colleges around San Jose, California. I also was a waiter and manager at a local restaurant there named Eulipia. I asked a fellow waiter if she would want to model for pay for my figure drawing class and she said yes. The class went off without a hitch. A year later I asked her again and she said she wanted to but now had a boyfriend. The boyfriend happened to be a cop. He didn’t know about the modeling from the year before so she wanted to talk to him about it first. She came back a few days later and said she had talked to him and he was fine with it. A week later though she said he had kept asking questions, had said some not so subtle jabs about what he thought she really was doing. She was worried about it which made me worried about it because I needed to make sure I had a model for the class that day. She assured me she would do it regardless of what he said. Great.
The day arrived and we were going to meet where we worked and drive together to the school. When I got there though, she was with her boyfriend and it looked a bit tense. She told me he wanted to talk to me. Great.
He came over and said, ‘I wondered if it is ok if I come along to the drawing class.’
This is not what I was expecting. A jealous, judgmental cop boyfriend watching his new girlfriend disrobe in front of a bunch of people and just stand there naked. I had visions of headlines the next day saying ‘art instructor killed by off duty cop in fit of jealous rage’. Great.
But he then said, ‘I long ago decided that anything I didn’t understand or feared I would face head on and seek to understand it. I want to come to see what really happens in a figure drawing class. She has told me what happens but I still have visions of something bad and dirty. I want to face that and see what it really is.’
How could I argue with that, right? I told him he could come along but he had to stay in the back of the class and not interfere. I told her she had to focus and not be distracted or intimidated by him being there. She understood and he was cool with that so off we went to the class.
The Naked Fear
The class was held at Mission College in Santa Clara. It was a HUGE spaceship style building that screamed intimidation and bulk as you drove up to it. I was sort of feeling that way about this new twist to my simple desire to get a model for my drawing class. Now I had a very bulky and intimidating cop/boyfriend about to sit in on my figure drawing class with his girlfriend as the singular object of close to 30 sets of eyes. Great.
The way it works in a figure drawing class is that the stage is a simple raised platform in the middle of the room. The students sit on benches around the platform and draw from all angles. The model has a place to change and comes out in a robe. He or she get on the platform, takes the robe off and starts to hit various poses. The students have already been instructed as to what they will be doing and they start in on it. We start with very quick poses and move on to longer ones. I call out the time and tell the model to change poses. The first pose might be as short as 20 seconds but most will be 1-5 minutes long for the first session. There will be a break then longer poses, up to 20 minutes towards the end. He or she might be sitting, laying down, standing, stretching, balled up, tense and muscular, draped and sleep-like. I had Katherine go through the poses, never looking over at her boyfriend. She also never got distracted, doing what I asked and being a great model for my students.
The Naked Revelation
When we took our first break Katherine got on her robe and the two of us went over to talk to her boyfriend. Much to my relief he said, ‘I completely get what is going on. It is exactly as she said it would be. I was imagining sexual poses, lascivious ogling but what I saw was a very focused and intense art moment. I am so glad you allowed me to come, I am not at all worried about it now.’ What he saw were the students intense in their work, me busy instructing, reminding & encouraging, and Katherine being deliberate in finding the perfect pose, adjusting if needed and staying as still as possible. What he saw was all of us working very hard.
He was not able to see that in advance. But because he had the guts to face his fear he was able to put the fear aside and see things for what they really were.
What worlds do you fear and don’t understand? What steps are you taking to find out what it’s really all about?
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Drawing and story by Marty Coleman
Inspired by a suggestion of Andrea Myers to address the topic of facing your fears. Thanks Andrea!
Andrea Myers
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 6, 2012 | Noam Chomsky |
The Church and The Illusion
I used to be a youth leader in a number of churches. I led bible and topic discussions for many years for kids ages 12-18. I eventually left being a leader when it became apparent I really couldn’t be effective. The reason I couldn’t be effective is that I wanted to kids to really think about things and come to their own conclusions. The church leadership said they wanted the same thing but I came to understand they were actually not interested in that. What they were interested in was giving the kids the illusion they had thought about things and come to their own conclusions.
How did I know this? Because the goal of the church was to have them believe and adhere to a very specific set of beliefs. The kids were not free to go where their minds led them so they were given the illusion of freedom by allowing debate and questions within a very limited and constricted box of acceptable opinions, just as the napkin drawing above illustrates. It is still that way in most every church in America and most religions around the world. I don’t like it because it does a grave disservice to the kids and to the integrity of the church or other institution that is foisting that same illusion on its youth.
Politics of the Unacceptable
Politics in America and many other countries is pretty much the same. A perfect example in America right now is the accusation many reactionary right wing partisans through about that President Obama is a communist, a socialist and a Muslim. Why are those effective tactics to use in falsely portraying Obama? Because those who propagate those tactics know that those 3 identities are outside the acceptable arena of debate in America. It is not acceptable to consider communism and socialism in political debate, they are wrong, dead, bad, evil, atheist, murderous, failed, morally perverse, anti-american and treasonous to consider those ideas. And it certainly is not acceptable to many Americans at this point in time to contemplate a President being of the Muslim faith. The reactionaries know this and they know that if they paint the President with these brushes, they can bully people into thinking he is wholly unacceptable.
And guess what? Reactionaries on the far left of the Democratic party do the same thing to Romney. Paint him with the brush of big business, of capital, of investments, of wall street, of incredible wealth and you paint him to be unacceptable. Why? Because considering big business as acceptable is unacceptable. People are bullied by that faction to not consider business and corporations as being valuable or good in any way. Some evangelicals and atheists paint Romney with the Mormon brush, wholly unacceptable. Others paint him with the ‘he hates all women’ brush, wholly unacceptable.
Thinking About What We Can’t Think About
In many cases it’s good you don’t think about it. It’s good it’s off the table for debate. We don’t want to consider the idea of slavery. We don’t want to consider the idea of genocide. We don’t want to consider the idea of…of what? What else is off the table for good reasons?
Even more importantly for our future, what is off the table because we have been told it is unacceptable but perhaps it’s not?
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Drawing by Marty Coleman
Quote by Noam Chomsky, 1928 – not dead yet, American linguist and writer among many other things.
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 5, 2012 | Uncategorized |
True or False?
Here is another in my series of quotes I both believe and don’t believe. What do you believe is my question. Is this quote true? If so, how so? How would it benefit you to shrink in this way?
Is this quote not true? How so? What would be detrimental about shrinking in this way?
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Drawing by Marty Coleman
Quote by Philip Stanhope, 4th Earl of Chesterfield, 1694-1773
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 4, 2012 | Quote Authors |
Here is what happened yesterday on our way out for lunch. The newscast is at the end of the story.
Life is unpredictable, believe it!
We were on our way to an early lunch before Caitlin returned to Dallas later in the day. We came to a 4 way stop about a mile or so from our house with 4 empty fields at the corners. Turning west we saw a huge black plume of smoke in the backyard of a home in a subdivision beyond the big empty field. My first thought was it was a barbeque gone bad, maybe a propane tank had exploded or something. But in a split second we all knew it was more than that. That it was so big and so black it had to be the actual house on fire. Linda and I decided to go into the subdivision to see if we could help.
This is what we saw.
I had already checked out the house and had just moved our car out of the way when I took the first photo.
FIRE!
When we arrived there were 3 people in front, the couple who owned the house and were in it at the time and a 3rd person who I thought was a neighbor. There was another neighbor on the side of the house using a water hose to try to stop the flames that had started to burn the fence. After we ascertained from them that there were no other people or animals in the house Linda and Caitlin helped the wife of the couple, who seemed to be in traumatic shock, while I went with the husband back into the front hall of the house looking for keys and medicines. We had to go ask the wife where they were though and by the time we got back the smoke coming from the back of the house was funneling directly to the front door and was getting pretty thick. With no life to worry about we decided to not attempt to go in and search for anything. Within minutes the house was engulfed like this.
Just another lazy day
By this time the owners had told us what had happened. They had been sitting on their couch, looking at their laptops doing some online shopping when the husband got up to go get ready for the day. He was in the bathroom when the power went out and a split second later they hard a loud bang and then an even bigger bang that shook the house. They ran into the living room to find a car had smashed into the back of their house. A woman was sitting stunned in the driver’s seat. The wife said she saw the fence was down and the grass was on fire behind the car. They screamed for her to get out of the car and the husband screamed even louder for her to turn the car off. She took a few seconds but eventually did those things. He yelled to his wife to get dressed (she had been in her nightgown) and they were out the door in just a few seconds. They believe the driver went out the back of the house and came around the side towards the front. She turned out to be the woman I had seen in the front as soon as we arrived. She took off right as she heard the sirens coming.
Linda takes action
Linda is always great in a crisis. She had been out of the car and helping the wife of the homeowner couple immediately. The woman was very shaky, obviously in shock at the turn of events. We reassured her, comforted her and held her up in case she got weak in the knees. Linda noticed right away she had no shoes on and ran back to the car to get her an extra pair she had. She then escorted the wife away a bit and a neighbor found a chair for her to sit in. Neighbors were out supplying water, lending cell phones, telling who lived where and how to contact them. We eventually had her go into the home across the street to get cool and not have to watch her home being destroyed. Linda and Caitlin stayed with her for the rest of the time until her daughter arrived. They both calmed her, found her a specific med she needed and listened to her talk about her loss.
Life, interrupted
The rest of the afternoon was spent helping and watching. It is a harsh reminder that zero is guaranteed in life. And when I say zero. I mean zero. Nothing. Most lives reflect the idea that all will go according to at least statistical norms. But then, on a lazy last day of summer, a car plows through your house and you are almost killed and your house and all your physical possessions are destroyed. It happened in a flash and their lives are changed forever. I have thought about this sort of randomness many times over the decades since I was in an accident early in my life. And now a prime example of it was happening right in front of me.
I probably wasn’t suppose to go around back, but I really wanted to see what had caused the damage. I wasn’t stopped so I just kept walking until I was in the back yard.
The Long Off Road
If you look close you can see the weaving tracks her car made. She made a direct hit on the electrical transformer box, blew out power, started the fire, then slammed into a house. She was later found hiding out in a church parking lot about 1/2 a mile away or so. She was brought back for the home owner to ID her and then led off to jail, charged with at least leaving the scene of an accident. It appeared later that she had been huffing some substance when she veered off the road. What it was is not known yet, but when I saw her in the police car getting ID’d she had a very hollow empty look. She was scared and stunned. I kept thinking how she must have going over all the steps that led her to make such a terrible mistake in her life. I expect her depression to be great.
Story Telling
Almost immediately after I posted the pics I had heard from Michelle Lowry at KJRH Ch. 2 asking if they could use the pics and telling me that a reporter would be there in about 10 minutes. I went to the husband and asked if wanted to be interviewed on camera and then asked if he was ok with me telling the story to whatever reporter showed up. Liz Bryant showed up shortly thereafter and proceeded to interview the police and fire department spokespeople. She briefly interviewed me so I could tell the homeowners’ story.
http://media2.kjrh.com/video/criticalmedia/2012/09/03/Jenks_woman_crashes_inb1568de8-1503-4b01-988c-13c3335174f5.mp4
Strangers no more
We stayed until the homeowner’s children and other family members arrived. It was as if we were now leaving dear friends. We wished them well and went on our way to what was now a late, not an early, lunch. We drove back to see what was happening about 2 hours later and the last fire truck was just packing up to go home.
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Drawing and story by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 3, 2012 | Uncategorized |
It’s a different kind of labor day in my mind today.
Illusions of Your Self
Have you ever had a moment when you realized you weren’t who you thought you were? Maybe you thought you were a paragon of moral virtue then found yourself having an affair. Maybe you thought you were heroic and brave only to find out when something dangerous happened you became a coward. Maybe you thought you were dowdy and prudish but later realized you were sexy and alluring.
How did these revelations come about? Sometimes they were forced upon you by circumstances. Other times it was someone who said something that allowed that new way of seeing yourself to come about. Maybe it was a book or a movie or the death of someone you loved. Whatever it was, it led you to believe you had a new identity. It was good perhaps, or maybe it was depressing to find this new you inhabiting your body.
The Real You, Distorted
But at least now you know the real you, right? Maybe our goal shouldn’t be to know the ‘real’ self. Maybe it should be to realize we have always been our real self, only slightly distorted, like in a fun house mirror. Maybe our goal should be to collect all those mirrors and look at all the multiple distortions honestly and clearly. Perhaps then we will see ourselves most accurately.
How do we do this? I like the idea of making a list of all my identities. Going all the way back to when you were young, who have you seen yourself as? I bet we would discover a lot, don’t you think?
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Drawing and quote by Marty Coleman
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