by Marty Coleman | Feb 26, 2014 | Illustrated Short Stories |
The Interview
Prologue
My car was being serviced. I was sitting at Starbucks.
Chapter 1
She was there a long time before he arrived. She had nothing to eat or drink. She had pale and rosy skin that glowed against the gray painting behind her.
Chapter 2
He arrived on the windy day. He immediately came over to her and shook her hand. He said, “You look just like your picture.”
She responded, “I’ve colored my hair since then.”
He said, “I like it. It’s fun.”
Chapter 3
They talked a long time. He gestured a lot with his left hand but never with his right. He had a small mocha and stirred it with his left hand when he wasn’t gesturing. She frequently looked down at her phone, using both hands to text. He didn’t stop talking or gesturing. She asked him some questions. She said “uh huh” and “like” often.
Chapter 4
He excused himself to go to the bathroom. When he got back she stood up and shook his hand. She said, “Thank you, it was nice meeting you.” Then he left. She watched him go out into the windy day.
Chapter 5
She put her phone to her ear and waited. Then she said, “Yea, it went ok. He’s not a good fit though. He doesn’t even use Twitter. Plus he wore brown shoes with a grey suit, who does that? When is the next interview for again?”
Epilogue
I saw her again a week later at the same Starbucks. She had a young man with her. He was dressed in purple and grey and they were going over a spreadsheet. She was doing the explaining and he was looking at her with awe. She had a Wired Magazine and a Vogue Magazine beside her computer. She had nothing to drink.
The End
Drawing and story by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 25, 2014 | Barbara Kingsolver, Mother's Day - 2011, Mothers Day |
We wave goodbye to the Mothers series with drawing #4.
This is true of fathers too, by the way.
The Gift
When I left home in 1973 for college, I really left. I went to college in Ohio, then Massachusetts, then moved to Hollywood, then to more college in Southern California, then to Michigan and back to California, this time Northern. I felt confident and able to make my way in the world and that is what I did. My parents raised me so I would be able to do that. I am very grateful for that gift.
The Forgetting
But with that confidence also came a forgetfulness. I forgot how much I had, at one point, needed them, especially my mother. I wish now I had repaid that attention with attention back to her in her later years. While I visited with some regularity, it really wasn’t as much as it should have been. My mother taught me well how to cope, and how not to cope, with life. I learned invaluable lessons from her, even when she was not aware of her teaching me. I did let her know some of that, and thank her for it, as best I was even aware of it at the time. But she died when she was young, only 62, and I was deep in the middle of raising young kids at the time, not really all the way to the place where I understood the lessons so I wasn’t able to thank her as I would want to now.
The Much Sweet and The little Bitter
Now my daughters are all grown. And all of them are strong and independent and able to make their way in the world. They make their missteps just as I did, but for the most part they are more than capable of correcting the misstep and moving on. They like hearing from me and they probably call me more than I call them. But they don’t need me the way they once did. A little bittersweet but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
The joy of seeing someone who once knew nothing of how to cope with the world navigate through it with class and intelligence is a heart-filling thing for a parent. I think it is probably easier for me, maybe as a man, maybe just as me, I am not sure, than it is for their mothers. But even though it might be harder, I know it makes them so very proud to see their daughters strong and capable, able to move forward on their own, just as it does me as well.
What is your story of letting go of your mother or your child? Was it easy, hard? How did you do it?
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Barbara Kingsolver, 1955 – not dead yet, American author
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 21, 2014 | Marty Coleman, Mother's Day - 2011, Mothers Day |
What a perfect day to present Mothers #3!
Perfection in Parenting
After Mothers #1 was published earlier this week a comment was posted by Julie from APlaceforThoughts.com. Julie was worried about failing at her work as a mother, comparing herself to her father who had to raise her on his own and had done a great job in her estimation. In the course of that conversation I came up with the above quote to try to assure her that it wasn’t about perfection in parenting, it was about love in parenting.
The thing is, kids are looking for love, not perfection. If you are supporting them and encouraging them and guiding them, they don’t really care if you are good at math, or able to run a marathon or make a million dollars a year. And if you do do all those things but don’t show them love, they don’t really care much about those accomplishments either.
Love Over Limitations
We all have our limitations in physical capabilities, emotional strength and intellectual prowess. One mother is missing an arm and a leg. Another never graduated from high school. A third is fragile emotionally. But none of that matters if they make the decision to deliver love to their children as best they are able. That is what the child will remember. That is what the child will pass on to their children.
Don’t expect to deliver perfection in your parenting. Expect to deliver love.
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Drawing, quote and commentary by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 20, 2014 | Travel Napkins |
Once again this week I needed to take a car in for servicing. This time it was my car. And again I spent the time waiting at Starbucks. This time I drew 3 drawings, one on a napkin, one in my small sketchbook, and one in a larger sketchbook I was given as part of the launch program. I also drew a number of work sketches for a new character I am working on for Napkin Dad Publishing .
I usually use a Sharpie Ultra Fine Point black pen for my napkin drawings. If I am actually traveling away from Tulsa I will have a selection of my colored markers with me as well but in town I just bring the black pen and wait until I am home to do any coloring.
This is Elaine. I drew her as she worked, then showed her the drawing. She seemed pleased. She took a picture and posted it on FB and very soon thereafter a mutual friend commented on the drawing saying it looked like a ‘Marty Coleman’ drawing. I thought that was cool.
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After that I moved to my sketchbook and drew two people in conversation. I use a different pen for my sketchbook. Recently I have been using a Signo UniBall for these types of drawings.
I would have shown her the drawing but they were deep in conversation, perhaps even an interview. I didn’t want to interrupt. They then left quickly and there was no time to show them.
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This final drawing I did in a large sketchbook. I had been drawing some studies for a character I am looking to develop for Napkin Dad Publishing, sort of a lead icon type character. I had done about 5 of those and was starting to repeat myself so I turned the page and started drawing these two people in conversation.
I didn’t show them the drawing because neither image really flatters them much and it gets pretty sensitive when I draw an inaccurate drawing of someone. I know it doesn’t look like them (nose too big, teeth to severe) but no matter what an artist says to a subject, they will take away that they really do look like that. So, sometimes it’s best to just not show it and move on.
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I then turned to working on my SXSW presentation coming up in 2 weeks (March 7th) in Austin. I have it on my cell phone so I am able to work on it to some degree. It’s great for making sure the timing, images and transitions are all working (they weren’t). It’s also great to see how it will appear on mobile devices.
Then the car place called and it was time to go. All in all a productive & creative morning.
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 19, 2014 | Jane Sellman, Mother's Day - 2011, Mothers Day |
Yesterday we wondered why, if evolution were true, mothers don’t have more hands.
Well, today I solved that problem.
SAHM, WAHM, WAW and WAHWEE
The Stay at Home Mom (SAHM) supposedly that means they don’t ‘work ‘at home, they just ‘stay’ at home. Those that ‘work’ at home, they are WAHMs. The Work at Home Mom combines some sort of job, all the way from part-time self-employed to full time corporate employment, with the bulk of the domestic activities. And then there are the WAWs (I just made this up). The Work at Work mothers go someplace to work and then come home. And then there are the WAHWEEs (I made this up too). Those are the ‘Work at Home & Work & Everywhere Else’ moms.
Most of the women I know, including my wife, sisters, oldest daughter and many friends, are WAHWEEs. In other words, all mothers are working mothers. They do it all and they are awesome.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Jane Sellman, American author and college professor
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 18, 2014 | Milton Berle, Mother's Day - 2011, Mothers Day |
The start of a new series on Motherhood.
Hard Moms
I always feel very sad when I hear from someone who had a mother that did not care for them as they deserved. I am not talking about moms that are a bit too controlling or a bit too demanding. I am talking about moms who abandon and abuse. It’s just really, really sad when I hear those memories come out.
Luckily it does seem they are in the minority. Most of those I know are very grateful for their mothers and what they did for them, even when there are shortcomings in them that cause hardship for us. I had that with my mother. She was an alcoholic and wasted many good years in a fog of liquor. But she became and stayed sober for 15 years before her death and that made a huge difference in the redemption our family had together. There is nothing quite as sweet as a family rebuilt and restored.
Emotional Hands
We read the quote above and look at the illustration and it seems to be about physical limitations. But what about all the emotional and psychological hands a mother needs? How many of those hands does one have available? It becomes a lot more complicated when we realize it’s not just about if they can do all the activities they need to do, but about all the emotional personas they have to deal with and be. It isn’t easy being a mom.
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Drawing and commentary © 2014 by Marty Coleman
Quote by Milton Berle, 1908-2002, American comedian
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 17, 2014 | Quote Authors |
Today in the US it is ‘Presidents’ Day’. It is also ‘Random Act of Kindness’ day. So I decided to make a mashup day. It’s now the ‘Presidents and Other Random People Day’.
I started by looking up some images of George Washington (Prez #1).
This is what I found.
I found the usual images but I also found some random images of people who didn’t, at first glance, seem to belong in a search for George. Since today is also Random Acts of Kindness Day I thought I would show a kindness by remembering and honoring these other people as well.
1. George the Myth
The painting is of George Washington as a young boy. It is illustrating the mythical story of him admitting to his father that he chopped down the cherry tree because he ‘could not tell a lie’. All Americans know that story and many of us know the painting. But who is the guy drawing back the curtain and pointing to the illustration? The name of the painting is ‘Parson Weem’s Fable’ by Grant Wood and the man in the painting is Parson Weems, the creator of the fable about the cherry tree. It’s been alleged, and with good reason based on his other exaggerations, that Weems made up the story. Washington was revered above all other figures among the founding fathers and mothers, and with good reason. But along with that admiration came a desire to exalt him way above his reality. This story was just one of many meant to put him up on a quasi-God pedestal. The truth is though, he needs no pedestal. The raw facts of his life and his efforts are enough to put him at the pinnacle of America.
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2. George the Inventor
This one isn’t hard to figure out. The photo is of George Washington Carver, the amazing scientist and educator. He was known primarily for his many discovered uses for peanuts that helped create a billion dollar industry. He was the one who introduced crop rotation to the south, saving it from soil depletion from heavy cotton and tobacco growing. He also was an inventor, educator, painter and a musician. This man was a great man, never once selling or patenting any ideas of his, always saying “God gave them to me, how can I sell them to others?”. Check him out, it’s worth it.
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3. George the Model
He’s a model and has nothing to do with George. The book however is about Washington as a young boy and man. Who knows how accurate it is.
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4. George the Congressman
It’s easy enough to assume his name is George Washington something and you would be right. He’s George Washington Collins. He was a Congressman from Illinois who died in 1972 in a plane crash after only 2+ years in office. His legacy was cut short, but his wife, Cardiss Hortense Collins, ran for his seat in congress and won. She ended up serving 24 years in the House of Representatives. A Random accident led to an amazing career for the first African American woman from the midwest to ever serve in Congress. Read her story, it’s also worth it.
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5. George the Bridge
Honestly this one caught my eye first. A modern day woman in an image search for George? That definitely didn’t make sense. But it does. George Washington had a bridge named after him, the bridge going between New Jersey and New York. This woman jumped off it to her death this month. Her name is Ashley Riggitano and she committed suicide on her 22nd birthday (Feb 6th, 2014). She was a burgeoning jewelry designer and fashionista in NYC. She left a suicide note in her Louis Vuitton bag she left on the bridge. In it she told of being bullied and harassed by ‘friends’, 5 of whom she named and said she did not want to be allowed at her funeral. These women included her supposed best friend and business partner in her jewelry business. One told her to “Go kill yourself with Xanax” shortly before she jumped off the bridge. Her family said she had suffered from depression and anti-depressants were found in her bag along with the note. It was also said she had tried to commit suicide before. It’s a very sad story.
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So, I was thinking maybe our random act of kindness today can be the giving of attention. I loved finding out who these people were, what they added to the world. They may all have passed away, but they deserve to be paid attention to, to be remembered in kindness, random or otherwise.
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© 2014 Marty Coleman | Napkin Dad Publishing
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 14, 2014 | Anonymous, Valentine's Day |
Happy Valentine’s Day to all my Napkin Kin!
Remember, whether you have a lover, BF, GF, BFF, husband, wife, all of the above or not, there is always someone in front of you who needs love.
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 12, 2014 | Sketchbook History Tour |
I had to drop off one of our cars to be serviced this week. I waited at a Tulsa Starbucks for a few hours hoping the car would be done without me having to drive home and back.
Here is the finished version of the line drawing I did in my sketchbook while there.
I thought it might be fun for you to see how one of my drawings looks before it is finished so I scanned it before I shaded it. Here’s the flat, color-only version.
The original drawing was done in pen. Here it is before any color was added.
What do you think? Is the final drawing the best or do you like one of the other two better?
And another question, what does it look like they were talking about? What are their stories?
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 10, 2014 | Breasts - 2012-2013, Joyce Grenfell |
I know many of the Napkin Kin would say the moment below is the moment, right?
Purchase the Original Drawing or Purchase a Print
The Sublime Moment
I don’t regularly have this sublime moment in my life repertoire, but I did have it once. The moment helped me understand the ecstasy of which my female friends speak. No, I didn’t enter a drag queen contest or dress up as a woman for Halloween (not that there’s anything wrong with that). I had to wear a heart monitor for 48 hours as part of my annual physical. It was strapped around my chest the whole time and what an annoyance it was. It was SO great to finally have it off. I figured out then that if I were female I would probably be one who takes her bra off the second she gets in her car to go home from work. I just knew I would want it off that bad.
Anyway, just a fun drawing today to let my female Napkin Kin know I understand your agony and ecstasy (at least a little bit!)
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Drawing by Marty Coleman
Quote by Joyce Grenfell, 1910-1979, English actor and songrwriter. She actually used the word ‘corset’ instead of ‘bra’ in the original quote. I can imagine a corset would be even harder to keep on all day.
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Happiness is the sublime moment when you get out of your bra at night
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 7, 2014 | Marcel Mariën |
What Enslaves Us
I found this quote yesterday and decided to use it on my morning’s napkin. I have my own things I am, or have been, slave to in my life, including a few on the list below. But I was interested in what others had to say about this topic so I posted the following question on Facebook:
Question: I am drawing a napkin today about what we are slaves to. What are you now, or have you been, slave to? What about others you know? Family traits, cultural?
Here is a list of the answers people talked about.
- Alcohol
- Insecurities
- Depression
- Anxiety
- Clichés
- Cell Phone
- Nothing
- Love
- Changing environment
- Government
- Voices in my head
- Petroleum
- Facebook
- The scale
- Rules
- Urgency
- Perfectionism
- Controlling things
- Consumerism
- Righteousness
- Fear
- Death
- My boss
- Need to please
- Society standards
- Work
- Beauty
- Guilt
- Masturbation
- Expectations
- Responsibilities
And finally,
Do you have others to add? It would make me happy if you would do so in the comments.
Rule Breaker/Rule Keeper
Out of that list I chose to illustrate the idea of ‘rules’. It seemed to me that most, if not all, the items on that list came back to our dealing with rules. Rules we either think we should or should not obey. Rules cover a lot.
I have family members and good friends who see themselves as rule keepers. They feel they are able to control their lives adequately by following the rules of society, government, work, and the rules in their own head. In most cases it seems to work for them. But I also know they get incredibly stressed out at times trying to follow all these rules. It’s draining because many of them are arbitrary, don’t contribute to actual goodness, and just make no sense. And yet they still obey those rules.
I also have family members and good friends who see themselves as rule breakers (myself included). They feel it gives them a freedom and a creativity to face the world with enthusiasm and fun. In most cases it works for them. But they also can get in trouble, or cause trouble, in situations where the trouble doesn’t help anyone. It’s not the positive trouble-making I mentioned a few days ago regarding entrepreneurs, it’s the trouble that comes from being oblivious to the benefits rules give to them and others. They break them without purpose, just to do it, or just ‘for fun’ without realizing how it may hurt themselves and others. And yet they still break the rules.
Some are in both camps. They are rule keepers to the world around them, but rule breakers secretly. We all are a bit like that I think, but some are so torn between the two that their public face and their private face have nothing in common. I believe that is a very dangerous place to be.
Why Polish?
Knowing what we are enslaved by is all well and good, but if we are interested in overcoming our slavery then the next, equally important question, is:
How and why do we ‘polish the chain’ that enslaves us? What causes us to do that?
What’s your answer?
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Drawing and questions by Marty Coleman, Answers by the Napkin Kin
Quote by Marcel Mariën, 1920-1993, Belgian Surrealist
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 5, 2014 | Norway |
I am published! Well, at least in Norway I am. I am in a book titled ‘Serviettboka’ which means ‘Napkin Book’ in Norwegian.
Napkin Book
Last year you might remember I posted a story about a woman in Norway, Inger Lise Skauge, who had collected upwards of 110,000 napkins over 65 years. She contacted me wanting to know if she could use some of my napkin drawings in a book she was writing about her napkins and napkins in general. I said yes and took the extra step of drawing a napkin specifically for her.
The Napkin Story
She was able to put it, along with the Napkin story and a number of other napkins, into a 2 page spread right in the middle of the book. It was in a section on alternative uses for napkins. I feel honored she chose to include me.
After it was published we decided to do a fair trade. I sent her the napkin for her to frame and put on her wall and she sent me the book to have.
Inger Lise promised to send me a photo of her with the napkin and here it is.
Inger Lise with Napkin
And there you have it, my first international publication, woo hoo!
Now on to conquer Sweden!
Here is my original post about how it all came about.
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Drawing, story and most of the photos by Marty Coleman
Book by Inger Lise Skauge
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 4, 2014 | James K. Glassman, Launching a Business - 2014 |
I hope I don’t cause trouble with #2 in my ‘Launching a Business’ series.
Launch
Last night was the first meeting of the 2014 TCC (Tulsa Community College) Launch program for Entrepreneurs. Napkin Dad Publishing is one of 15 teams taking this 16 week program on how to launch a business. As a result of this I thought I would do a series on launching a business. #1 in the series is linked below.
Me, A Trouble Maker?
Some might say so. But honestly, I am excited to learn the ‘right way’ to do things. That doesn’t mean I am going to do things that way mind you, just that I am going to learn those ways. I might do them too, who knows!
What is ‘making trouble’ anyway? I don’t know much about the business world but it seems the intent and effect of an entrepreneur with a good idea is to stir things up, causing a change to occur. For example, they might change the accepted order of things in their industry by putting out a product that threatens an existing product. They might brand, market, advertise and sell in ways completely foreign and bizarre to established players, vendors and competitors. Just look at the technology, networking and communication changes in the last 10-20 years if you don’t think that is possible. In any number of directions the entrepreneur is a trouble maker. I like that idea so maybe I am a trouble maker.
The Napkin Kin
I love my Napkin Kin and feel you all are some of the smartest and most insightful people around. I will be asking you questions, throwing out ideas, announcing directions and changes over the next several months. I am looking forward to hearing your ideas, suggestions, critiques and analysis as we move forward.
Feel free to send me your ideas. You can reach me by commenting on this or any blog post, of course. You can also drop a line directly to me at marty@napkindad.com. You can always reach me on The Napkin’s Facebook page or on twitter @thenapkindad. I look forward to hearing from you.
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Dreaming It – Launching a Business #1
The Trouble Maker – Launching a Business #2
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by James K. Glassman, 1947 – not dead yet, American business writer
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