by Marty Coleman | Jun 24, 2009 | Oscar Levant, Self |
What did you want to be? Once in a while I think of all the careers I
could have had, what I could have achieved.
When I was a kid most people said I should be a lawyer because I could
argue so well. I never wanted to become a lawyer. I did, however, want
to be President since my parents were such big fans of JFK at the time
and it seemed a very cool thing to be.
I have been told that I should have been a therapist. I have never wanted
to be a full-time therapist, but I did want to be a preacher. I like the idea
of thinking deep thoughts and then telling other people about them.
I have been told I should have been a masseur. I never wanted to be a
full-time masseur, but I did want to take classes and learn more. I haven’t
done that yet.
I had the heritage that said maybe I should be a pilot. I never wanted to
be a full-time pilot, but I always loved to fly and see the world from above
in a small plane. I don’t fly anymore, but maybe someday I will again.
I was told I should be a teacher. I actually was a teacher at the college
level for 9 years. I loved it. I tried to land a full-time job as a teacher and
never made it. I miss being a teacher and perhaps will again someday.
I was never told I should be an artist. Do you know why? Because everyone
already knew I was going to be an artist. I don’t think anyone ever thought
I would not be an artist. I am glad I am an artist.
It doesn’t mean there aren’t other things I wish I could have done and been.
I think any curious and enthusiastic person has more things in their wish
list than they can actually accomplish in one life.
I prefer that to having no wish list.
What did you want to be?
“It’s not what you are, it’s what you don’t become that hurts.” – Oscar Levant
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 23, 2009 | Rose Kennedy |
I have thought about ‘moments’ a lot over the years. Mostly I have focused
on the arrival of a moment, when something happens that demands you
make a decision about how to respond. That moment when you must
choose an ethical or moral path.
For example, a friend wrote recently about taking dance lessons.
There was a moment in the first group lesson where one of the other
students was about to be left out of an activity. People had paired up and
my friend could see this young woman, shy and nervous, wasn’t going
to be included. Nobody’s fault, no evil intentions, just how it played out.
The girl was shrugging her shoulders at the teacher’s encouragement.
My friend had a moment. A moment to decide which direction she would
go. She chose to lightly slap the girl on the arm and say ‘Hey, let’s just go for it’
and the lonely student, the teacher and my friend did the routine together
and had fun. That was all it took.
It’s a simple moment in which you decide to be kind, to be loving, to be forgiving.
It’s that moment when you know you are creating your character and you
create it. Then you smile at yourself for doing the good thing and look for
the next moment with joy.
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 22, 2009 | Fame, Mae West, Self |
A circular dilemma: you want to be noticed, seen, known, paid attention to.
You do what you can to make that happen. Then you realize that the
‘you’ that got the attention made the rest of ‘you’ invisible. So, you try to
downplay the attention-getting part and you discover you are still mostly
invisible. You don’t like that so you go back to emphasizing the parts that
got looked over. Then you feel the rest of you is invisible again.
Who wants to support the Napkin Dad? You can do so easily by PayPal via the donate button in the upper right.
“It’s better to be looked over than to be overlooked.” – Mae West
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 21, 2009 | Bruce Barton |
This is the Napkin Dad’s #1 in the list of things I hope I have imparted
to my daughters. It’s #1 because it won’t matter if they want to be a
secret agent or an insurance agent. They will understand that enthusiasm
is the backbone of achievement, purpose, satisfaction and joy.
Happy Father’s day to those who are, and Happy ‘you ain’t a father yet’ day
to those who aren’t. If you have one on the way, it’s wonderful. Be
ENTHUSIASTIC!
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 20, 2009 | Racism - 2001-2016, Voltaire |
What is an absurdity? It is something that is not believable IF you are
paying attention and thinking it through. You have to purposely ignore
evidence that is easily in reach and you have to have a pre-existing (even
if unconscious) desire to believe the absurdity for it to persuade you.
How does it lead to atrocities? If you believe, as people of many races
have over the centuries, that people of other races are not fully human,
then denying them rights (or killing them) is easily rationalized.
If you believe, as people of many religions have over the centuries, that
people of other religions are eternally damned, then treating them as
less than human (or killing them) is easily rationalized.
If you believe, as people of many political persuasions have over the
centuries, that those who don’t believe in the same way of governing
as you do are evil and corrupt, then keeping them from being politically
involved (or killing them) is easily rationalized.
If you believe, as people of both genders have over the centuries, that
women are less intelligent and able than men, then oppressing them
(or killing them) is easily rationalized.
Where did those actions come from over the centuries? From believing absurdities.
“Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities.” – Francois-Marie Arouet (Voltaire)
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 19, 2009 | Richard Needham |
This one is a companion to a napkin titled ‘The Person Who Always Says’
that I drew a few days ago.
If I am honest about it, I Honestly think this means I am doing a series on honesty.
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 18, 2009 | Roger Miller |
To my dear east coast friends who have been deluged with rain this spring
and summer, only thing to do is go stomp in some puddles! It’s all about
the attitude, right?
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 17, 2009 | Elizabeth Barry, Marty Coleman |
>
My daughter, Chelsea Coleman, owns ‘Bootstrap Farm’ with her husband,
Don Drury. They grow organic and natural veggies and sell them to the
local restaurants and at the Cherry Street farmer’s market here in Tulsa.
She was part of a panel discussion last night during Local Food Week
here in Tulsa. I was very proud of her and her contribution to the discussion.
Oh, and yes. I take credit for all that she is, of course.
A big part of the discussion was about the health and environmental benefits
of buying locally grown foods as much as possible. The processing, shipping
and storing of food coming from far away can make diseases and spoilage more
frequent among other problems.
The best reason to buy and eat locally though is to become part of your
community. Day to day not knowing your neighbors or farmers or small
business owners may not be a big deal. But over years you realize that you
have no connections to your world, your land or your town. It isn’t a good
feeling. Get out and connect, enjoy, meet, buy, frequent, get to know and
love where you are planted and see if you don’t grow better than before as well!
“Shipping is a terrible thing to do to a vegetable. Think of the jet lag!” – variation of a quote from Elizabeth Barry
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 16, 2009 | Death - 2001-2011, Marty Coleman |
A bird fell in the brambles,
a place I could not get.
small and frail, not fully grown,
beyond the fence it set.
Wiggle dog brought it attention,
barking incessantly.
The mother and father dive bombing
To keep her away from tree.
This morning she still is there,
breathing shallow I see.
The parents squawking above us,
Wiggle dog fast against the tree.
She is bound to die I know,
It’s sad to contemplate.
Sadder for the parents
unable to change her fate.
The dog, she barks away,
at a bird on it’s last gasp.
Today she barked at something
just beyond her grasp.
Marty Coleman
June 16, 2009
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by Marty Coleman | Jun 15, 2009 | Anonymous |
There are a lot of people who take pride in being ‘honest’ and ‘saying
it like it is’. There are the positive elements of this in business and in
personal lives.
But there is another type, the random type. It is seductive to think they
are more honest, more real, more truthful than the rest of us and hold
some special place in honesty heaven as a result. But if you really, truly
look at what comes out of their mouth, most of the time it isn’t really
about honesty and some exalted sense of forthrightness.
In those random cases it is about two other things. One, it is about not
knowing boundaries, not knowing when to shut up. Two it is about
enjoying the power to shock and get a reaction.
This is especially important to help teenagers to understand. Verbal
‘honesty’ has a purpose, it isn’t just a lack of self-control, or a weapon.
It is used to help people or situations. You can be honest about your
mother or father or friend having trouble with alcohol. You can be
honest with your spouse about your feelings. That is legitimate. But
to just spout off supposed truths because you are the ‘honest’ type is
an immature and mean-spirited thing to do. Teaching our children
the difference, when to use ‘honesty’ and when to shut up, is one of
the best things we can do for them.
“The person who always says just what he thinks at last gets just what he deserves.” – anonymous
…………………………………………………………………………..
This is ‘Didchya Know?’ Monday
In the last month the Napkin Dad Daily has been visited by
15 universities from around the world.
- Boston College, Massachusetts – USA
- Georgia State University, – USA
- Harvard University, Massachusetts – USA
- Haifa University – Israel
- Hampden-Sydney College, Virginia – USA
- Lake Tahoe Community College, California – USA
- McMasters University, Ontario – Canada
- Moore College, Pennsylvania – USA
- North Dakota University – USA
- Oklahoma State University, Tulsa – USA
- Trinity College, Hartford, Connecticut – USA
- Universidad de Zaragoza – Spain
- University of California, Merced – USA
- University of California, Los Angeles – USA
- University of Missouri, Columbia – USA
- University of Nebraska, Kearney – USA
- University of Tulsa, Oklahoma – USA
Where are you visiting from today?
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