If you are involved in religious circles you have undoubtedly come across the parent who not only doesn’t want their child to swear (an admirable quality) but goes even further and doesn’t allow their child to use even mild alternatives for certain swear words. They can’t say dang instead of damn, they can’t say heck instead of hell, they can’t say shoot instead of shit.
The parent is obviously trying to instill some virtue in their child and they think that by banning even the alternative words they are doing that. It seems misguided to me. What I think can be in danger of happening isn’t a formation of a virtuous child, but the formation of a repressed child. Through the squelching of their expressiveness the child learns that it’s not ok to be expressive, simple as that.
I have heard it said that the idea behind this repression of expression is to teach the child to use the best and most proper expressive terms. In my opinion, those alternative words ARE the most proper expressive terms and that is why they are used. It doesn’t show a lack of ability for expression, it IS the expression.
We all are fools to some degree. I mean, come on, I am trying to make a living drawing on NAPKINS. That could be deemed pretty foolish. But self-confidence is what I call it. I believe I can do it even if others looking from a distance (or even close up) think it’s foolish. It isn’t much different than crossing over a deep crevasse on a rickety board. It’s actually more like crossing over 397,453, 291 crevasses, some with no boards, but I didn’t want to draw that many.
What ‘foolish’ thing are you attempting today? If you haven’t started, APRIL FOOL’S DAY is a great day to get going!
Why do you think people become preachers and teachers anyway! I know how easy it is to tell others how to be good, after all a lot of my drawings and commentaries are all about that, and I think it’s a pretty cool thing to do with my life.
But, a critical part of what I do is examine myself to see if I can honestly say I am following my own advice. Sometimes I am, sometimes not so much. I don’t avoid topics just because I struggle with them, I wouldn’t say much of anything if that were the case.
But, just like a good preacher, I do try to get across that I am preaching first to myself. If I need to learn something it’s often through talking to myself via my writing and drawing that I get the chance to clarify and refine what it is I am hoping to achieve or become.
It’s after that I am hopeful what I have come up with will help others as well.
Drawing and commentary 2025 Marty Coleman | napkindad.com
Quote by Mark Twain (Samuel Langhorne Clemens), 1835-1910, American author and humorist
It’s no coincidence that I drew about coincidence today.
Part 1: I remember Jackie from my days working at Eulipia Restaurant in San Jose, California. We, along with our many co-workers, work intensely hard under incredible stress then hang out and relax after the shift. We do this for almost a decade together. We all know each other’s strengths and weaknesses pretty well. I know her as being, first and foremost, very strong. She can pull more than her weight in work, surpassing almost anyone else in energy, going for hours and hours without a break. She can also be emotional, with strong feelings and strong opinions. And she has the ability to have a great deal of fun. She is the epitome of the saying ‘work hard, play hard’. I think she is a fantastic woman and love working with her. I have the opportunity to draw her a few times over the years. We reconnect on Facebook in 2010. I find out that she is married with children and is into martial arts and kick boxing. That strength I saw way back when obviously has found an incredibly positive outlet. I read about her enthusiasm and love of her sport. I see photos of her training, fighting and enjoying her life. I am very happy for her.
Part 2: I am speaking at a conference in 2011. I am 1,600 miles and 24 years away from the drawing I did of her. I meet a fellow speaker, Ronald Skelton, for the first time. We have the group photo taken of all the speakers and it’s posted on Facebook. I am tagged in it so it shows up on my FB wall. Jackie visits my wall and sees the photo. She comments : ‘Wow, I know two people in Oklahoma (both on my Facebook), and they’re both in this photo. Ron Skelton used to train at my martial arts school, Tribull, and still helps us periodically with our web site! Small world.
Part 3: I contact Ronald and we talk about the coincidence. He shows me a photo of the two of them together in a group shot from 2004.Part 4: Ronald and I are going to get together, see how we can help each other in the future.
Part 5: I love coincidences. They make me smile.
Drawing and story 2025 Marty Coleman | napkindad.com Quote by Emma Bull, 1954-not dead yet, science fiction author
I have been living in Oklahoma almost 17 years now and I have seen a LOT of video footage of tornadoes. I have even seen in person any number of storms that were threatening to become one. Luckily I haven’t seen an actual tornado. The most amazing thing about them is how tall and thin they are. They have virtually no substance to them at all and they usually don’t last very long.
Happiness is much the same way. Much like a tornado, happiness can effect much beyond it’s immediate borders even if it is only in existence for a few moments. What a person is rubs off on others. If you are happy AND express it, then others see it, feel it, and might be pulled in by it to move towards ‘happy’ as well.
Be a happiness tornado for a moment or two today. See who you can pull in.
It’s day 3 of Metaphor week. I am enjoying my new book, ‘I Never Metaphor I Didn’t Like – a comprehensive compilation of history’s greatest analogies, metaphors, and similes’, but I am realizing as I go that so many quotes I have read and used over the years have been in one of those three categories already!
Sometimes I feel like that myself. I am a very social person and I actually keep up with many people from my past, people who are life-long friends, but like many men, I don’t have a ton of close guy friends.
I first realized this when I got divorced in 2000. One of the elements that led up to the divorce caused there to be a split between friend and I. Until that happened I thought of him as a guy I saw once in a while. We socialized, had some creative and extended family elements in common, but that was about it. But after it happened I realized that he was one of my closest guy friends. It actually seemed sort of pathetic to me at the time. This guy I spend barely any time with turns to be one of my closest friends. It made the divorce all the harder.
That is one reason I like organized recreation, such as the running group I am in. I have been injured lately (achilles tendon) and so have not been running. I have really missed it. In part because of the exercise (I have gained weight for sure) but also because of the friendships. I miss hearing what is going on in people’s lives. I miss telling stories of my life. I miss encouraging my friends.
Yesterday I mentioned something I used to say to my daughters as they went to school in the morning. I would say ‘Make good friends, keep good friends’. How do you do those two things?
It’s Metaphor Week at the NDD! First, a definition. A metaphor is a direct claim that
A is X. A simile is similar, but it says A is like X, not A is X.
Want to stay young at heart? Have not only the courage of your convictions, but the courage to explore them thoroughly.
Drawing and commentary 2025 by Marty Coleman | napkindad.com
Quote by F. Scott Fitzgerald, 1896-1940, American author and screenwriter. Ironically he died at the exact age of the older person in his quote.
My older sister and I are a lot alike in some ways. Because of that, on occasion we can grate against each other. In 2009 my then 91 year old father had a fall and broke his hip.
My younger sister, who lives closest to him and sees him often, was just about to go on a long planned family vacation when it happened. My older sister and I flew out to take care of him while she was gone.
Honestly I had a bit of anxiety wondering if my sister and I would get along. We ended up spending 10 days together taking care of him in the hospital, sometimes tag teaming it, other times being there together for the entire day. The rest of the time we were at my younger sister’s home. We didn’t argue, we didn’t grate and we didn’t disagree about anything, at least not from my perspective.
What we experienced was miniscule compared to what happens in a calamity the size of the events in Japan, Haiti and Banda Aceh over the past few years. But the idea is the same; in circumstances where you are either trying to survive or helping someone else survive you lose interest in petty squabbles and selfish positions.
The question is, how do you tap into that sensitivity when life is ‘normal’? What do you have to remember, do, say or not say to make it happen? Give your insight and advice in the comments, ok?
Sadly, it’s one catastrophe on top of another on Day 4 of Catastrophe Week at the NDD
The man who discovered the power of the atom, the man whose brilliant understanding of the universe led to a burst of scientific discovery, that man, Albert Einstein, said this. And he was right.
Our human mode of thinking is still dominated by fear, greed, power and prestige. It’s as if we were given new ingredients for a new recipe in a kitchen with new appliances but we insisted on cooking it according to an old recipe. We cook, disaster. We try the same recipe again, disaster. One more time, disaster.
I think it’s time we realized we are in a new human kitchen and need new recipes for how to cook.
