by Marty Coleman | Mar 16, 2015 | Illustrated Short Stories, Travel |
Chapter One
She was sitting across from the man, staring out at the planes landing and taking off. He observed her in between checking his email, an intriguing diversion from the drudgery of catching up with a week’s worth of business.
She was sunburnt head to toe, glowing a deep orange/red. Her hair swept back from her forehead in cornrows to an arc as if she had a headband on, but she didn’t. From there her hair fell in tight, sharp waves to her shoulders. Her top plunged low, revealing a long expanse of skin, mottled and pealing. It had that rich deep tone that said she’d spent many a day in the sun. There was the faintest view of a tanline at the edge of the blouse, but even that area was dark, as if she had taken her straps down every time she had laid out to sun.
She had on a colorful print top, bright blue jeans rolled up halfway up her calves. Her calves were well defined and she had on a new pair of running shoes. She sat upright but not stiff, holding her purse as it nestled on top of a woven basket bag that she had obviously bought while in Mexico.
(more…)
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 22, 2015 | Series, Travel |
I turned 60 last month and posted ’60 at 60′, a sort of list of things I want to do this year. One on the list was ‘visit 6 new places’ and I am at #1 on that list this week.
I am in Punta Mita, Mexico. It’s north of Puerto Vallarta by about 45 minutes. I was raised in San Diego, California as a young boy but surprisingly never went farther into Mexico than Tijuana. So this is my first time beyond the border.
I am here with my wife, her brother and sister, and their spouses. The 6 of us have wanted to do something like this for a while and two of us turning 60 was enough of an excuse to make it happen.
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It’s an all-inclusive resort, Iberostar. I was a bit worried about that since my preference would be to experience Mexico more directly than through this filter. But it’s turned out to be better than expected and very easy, something a few our party really wanted.
The key for me so far has been to choose as authentic a direction among my choices as I can. This means that while the restaurants and buffets do have ‘American’ food they also have pretty amazing Mexican food choices as well. I continue to choose those.
We’ve been on one excursion so far, to Islas Mariettas, two islands off the coast of Punta Mita. One has a hidden beach you have to swim through a cave to get to. It really isn’t hidden, a lot of tourists go to it, but that’s ok, it was a cool experience and not that crowded in the morning.
So, Here’s an example of ‘authentic’. When we got off the boat I had to go to the bathroom and didn’t want to wait until after the bouncy drive back to the hotel. The little spot filled with fisherman and others, music, smells, carts, dogs, fishing nets and beer bottles. The bathroom was not going to be the sterilized American style, I knew that much. But it was the best smelling urinal I had been in in a long time due to their life hack of throwing their used limes into it to compensate for the smell. It’s been my favorite part of the trip so far.
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 23, 2014 | California Road Trip - 2014, Family History |
Hello Napkin Kin! Here is the end of the road trip posts.
Day 7
Today I leave Berkeley and head back home to Oklahoma. I am sad to leave so soon, having only spent less than 4 full days with Chelsea and her new family. But with a total of 6 days on the road, it makes for a long time away from home.
I woke up to a beautiful and cool Berkeley morning. Another person was staying at the Airbnb that night and we had met the evening before. She was a runner so we had a great conversation about it, including a bit of coaching from me about injury recovery. She mentioned she was going to go on a run the next morning, up the the same park I had done my trail run the day before. I didn’t ask if she wanted a running partner because I didn’t think we knew each other well enough to get in the car together and go traipsing off into the woods. However, when she got back from her run she said she had decided to just skip the trip to the park and run right from the house. Then I wish I had gone on the run with her! Instead I toasted another runner who happened by as I was packing.
Here is the Airbnb link to Edrie and JoAnn’s spot. If you are going to Berkeley, I highly recommend them.
I said adios to Mr. Otis, telling him to take good care of his mama and daddy.
Then I took a selfie with Chelsea in the bright morning sun of Berkeley and said my goodbyes as I drove off into the sunrise!
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On the Road Again
Photo courtesy of Airbnb and Denise (homeowner)
It took me most of the day to drive to Arizona. I rolled in to the Airbnb in Lake Havasu City and I had time to go see the famous London Bridge that they bought from London and transported piece by piece to Lake Havasu and reconstructed. I had dinner overlooking it. The home was a nice place on a golf course but they had large dogs that barked into the night, right outside my room, that made sleeping not so easy for a while. Luckily they either fell asleep or the owner brought them into his room and I eventually got a good night’s sleep.
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Day 8
I was out the door and ready to get rolling as the sun rose over the desert. I had a long way to go to get to my destination in Ruidoso, New Mexico.
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Trinity and American Pie
I went a secondary route through much of Arizona and New Mexico, south of the usual Route 40 headed east. I was listening to a audio book and not paying much attention when I passed a sign that barely caught my eye. I stopped and did a u-turn to see if it was what I thought it was.
And it was. It was Trinity. The spot of the very first explosion of an atomic bomb. That is one of the most momentous moments in world history, as well as US war history. I just stood there and thought about how that moment changed the world in so many ways. It’s humbling to be in a spot like that, especially one that is so profoundly peaceful, quiet and serene, and realize the violence and unforeseen consequences that came from that moment.
I continued down the 2 lane highway for hours, seeing almost no traffic at all. But then, I turned a long sweeping arch and found myself smack dab in the middle of a party. Hundreds of cars and people parked on the side of the road in ‘Pie Town, New Mexico. I think the actual town consists of just this store, the ‘Pie-o-neer’.
It turns out there was a pie festival with contests and awards, pie making demos and more. I didn’t see much of that but I did walk among the booths and found a couple good things to bring home for Linda.
This lady, Cindy Yarmal, was selling veggies on the front porch of the pie shop while tourists mingled and a good ol’ boy band played some tunes on the other end of the porch. I asked her if I could take her photo and she obliged me. After I sat and enjoyed a slice of Blackberry pie as the world swirled around me.
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Snowcap Adobe
I arrived at ‘The Snowcap Adobe’ just as the sun had set. I had contacted the owner, Susan, earlier in the day to let her know my time of arrival and she told me she had her best friend over and chili on the stove, asking if I would want some for dinner instead of having to find food before I arrived. That was a welcomed idea and I took her up on it!
Photo courtesy of Airbnb and Susan (homeowner)
Her home was amazing. It was built by her family many decades ago and she had updated it in recent years to make it a welcoming spot for travelers. It felt homey and warm. The three of us sat at her kitchen counter and she told me the story of her family and her home. Susan was a great story teller, especially about her grandfather, a well known artist in the mid-twentieth century regionalist tradition. She had even done her Ph.D. thesis on his use of symbolism in his art.
Photo courtesy of Airbnb and Susan (homeowner)
This was my bedroom for the night, comfortable and genuine New Mexico.
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Day 9 – Headed Home
Finally I was on my last day. I once again left early, before Susan had awoke. This is an early morning view of her solarium that her mother tended while she was still alive. It is still filled with plants but Susan says she forgets to water them. There are a lot of plants, I probably would too.
I drove northeast through rural New Mexico and Texas until I reached Amarillo. During that stretch I found one last interesting place. Alanbeen, Texas was a gas station and a motel. That was it as far as I could tell. The station said it was the post office too so I think that pretty much says it all.
The gas station consisted of one pump. Surprisingly it did take credit cards. But I couldn’t pass up the chance to go into the convenience store so I let it run and went inside.
And good thing I did, because otherwise I would have missed this sexy Texas miss smiling at me! The place was a hoot, covered top to bottom with stuff, most old Texas memorabilia and trinkets.
And then was a beeline home. I arrived in time to have dinner and relax, hear about Linda’s bachelorette week and show her some photos of Mr. Otis!
And that’s the end of this road trip! Next stop will be the opposite coast to visit my OTHER grandchild, Vivian. Not sure when that will be but I will let you know.
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California Road Trip
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 22, 2014 | California Road Trip - 2014, Family History, Travel |
Continuing my epic road trip to California and back…
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Day 6
By day 3 in Berkeley I had a rhythm of going to the French Hotel and Coffee Bar on Shattuck to pick up some pastries and coffee, then heading over to Chelsea’s house. She seemed thankful for the Cafe Mocha that morning but it sort of looks like Otis is in need of it even more.
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One of the cool things about staying at Airbnb spots is seeing homes uniquely designed.
My hosts in Berkeley had devised a pretty cool way to both display and have available their collection of earrings. they simply hooked them on the bottom of the sheer curtain in the guest bathroom. I don’t know if it originally was a way to keep the curtain weighted when the window was open and the wind was blowing, but it made for a fun and unexpected design element in the bathroom.
And here was another design element in the bathroom I thought was pretty cool. It was a functional art piece on the wall and I liked it! And no, I did not steal any of the belts, though the green one was tempting!
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Graham had to rehearse for a big show he was going to be in so Chelsea, Otis and I took a foray into the hills of Berkeley. We went up to the very top of the area, to Tilden Regional Park. It is a beautiful and serene spot not at all far from the bustle of the East Bay. We chose Lake Anza because Chelsea could sit and nurse Otis while I went on a run around the lake and presumably I would not get lost. I took a few spurs off the lake not realizing it but I made my way back without too much consternation on anyone’s part.
This is about a 3rd of the way around the lake. Chelsea and Otis are just to the right of the marker in the water in the middle of the image. On the left is a popular beach that allows you to swim in the lake. It even has lap lanes beyond the play swim area. I thought that was a pretty cool idea.
Right after taking the vista shot of the lake I turned was about to restart my run when I found this fellow fetching balls while wearing a doggie floatie vest. I immediately thought of a friend of mine back in Tulsa, Rosemary Dougherty, who has a serious love affair with all things bulldog. I knew it would make her happy to see him and it did.
In the meanwhile, this is the trail I was running. I thought I was going to be running a flat trail around a lake, but it was anything but. It was a challenge! I twisted my foot at one point but didn’t really feel it until that night and it wasn’t serious.
When I returned Otis was a happy camper, as you can tell!
After Otis was filled we took a hike down Chelsea’s favorite trail. It was easier than the running trail I found, that is for sure. We think of redwoods as being in big forests all by themselves but throughout Northern California there are many places they grow in and among a wide range of trees. Tilden Park is one of those places.
Along the trail we found an old pump house. I loved the stone around the empty window and had Chelsea and Otis sit in it for a portrait.
I got Chelsea to take one of me as well.
Chelsea kept Otis in the wrap for the entire hike. It was long and got a bit warm by Berkeley standards (still felt cool to someone from Oklahoma though). It translated into both of them being very tired when we returned to her apartment and they settled into a nice nap.
While they slept Graham and I walked down to Shattuck Avenue, to an area of Berkeley known as the Gourmet Ghetto. Destination: The Cheese Board. As you can tell from the line in the photo, it is a popular place. It sells only one type of pizza per day. No choice. It’s listed on a board but all those people in line? They don’t check first to see what the type is for that day. They know it will be great and they are going to get it no matter what. We were the same way. Turned out ours was fantastic, with guacamole and cilantro and peppers and sausage (if I remember correctly). YUM! They also had a cool jazz band playing. It was quintessential Berkeley.
Later that night Otis’ Godmother Lina came over to see Otis and meet me for the first time. We hung around for a long time talking about all sorts of things. She had just returned from her umpteenth time at Burning Man so she had lots of stories to tell. Chelsea and she gave me the low down on how to prepare and experience Burning Man in case I ever make it to the event. I want to and hope to within the next few years!
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California Road Trip
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 18, 2014 | California Road Trip - 2014, Family History |
Hello again Napkin Kin! Here is the part 2 of my epic road trip to the west coast this past week.
Day 4
Since Chelsea and Graham live in a studio apartment with a new born, my housing was obviously going to be elsewhere. I found a great Airbnb spot about 6 blocks away in the Berkeley Hills. This is their living room overlooking the small winding street below. Edrie and her partner JoAnn were friendly and hospitable hosts, with coffee in a French press ready for me each morning.
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Chelsea’s family unit had an appointment on Tuesday morning so I was solo for a few hours. I took advantage of the time to get my first run in. I had to return the U-Haul trailer and the location was way down in flats of Berkeley, near the San Francisco Bay. I figured there had to be running trails near the bay and I found a great one that goes for miles and miles. Within that trail was a loop that went out into the bay towards the Berkeley Marina. It was there that I found Cesar Chavez Park, with a great latticework of dirt and asphalt trails.
The sky was overcast and the air was cool with that fantastic California ocean breeze. After a summer of 90 + degree running days in Tulsa, it was exhilarating to run in cooler temps. It wasn’t just the temps but the surroundings. This little peninsula of a park was beautiful and natural. You would not know you were in the middle of one of the most densely populated areas of the United States, that is for sure. But as I crested over a little hill in the middle of the park I realized where I was.
It may look like just a trail with water in the background but look close. The water leads to a bridge on the left, which leads to a city which lead to another bridge in the center right. One of the best things about running in new places is how you always end up seeing that place in ways you can’t anticipate. Seeing the Bay Bridge, San Francisco and the Golden Gate Bridge all at the same time from this angle was fantastic. It was so cool I made this loop about 3 times, going 2 miles further than I had planned, just so I could experience it longer.
Then of course there is the more mundane angle to a run. What can be a majestic bay is always a small and intimate one with birds and mud and grass just like the Arkansas River back home or any other body of water. But look close again and there are always things to admire and wonder at.
Here is another thing runners often see that others don’t, the homeless. Of course in most cities you don’t find them waking up with this view. A night outdoors might be a tad bit easier on the SF Bay, but overall I have a feeling the burden is the same no matter where it is.
As I turned around at the halfway point of my run I glimpsed the BerkeleyMarina and the Berkeley Hills from whence I had come.
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When I returned the Coleman-Patzner family were folding laundry and playing. No worries, he isn’t about to break his neck. He does a lot of backward and upward bending motions and his neck is already quite strong. I experienced it first hand. Not bad for a 6 week old!
Otis and I hung out on the porch for a while. He was quite mesmerized by the amazing stories of my many road trips, as you can tell.
So much so that it wore him out. Here he is dreaming of going on an epic road trip with Papa Marty.
Even though Linda wasn’t there, I knew it was what she would have done so Chelsea, Otis and I went on a shopping trip that afternoon, getting stuff for the kitchen and the rest of the apartment. We also got fixins for a family dinner.
Graham’s parents, Curt and Karla Patzner, came over for dinner. I had met Karla before but hadn’t met Curt. I liked him because well, he had a nice hat. What more did I need to know, right? I made Linda’s famous Smoked Salmon Pasta with lemon and Dill. It went over pretty well!
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Day 5
It was babysitting day for me! Graham and Chelsea took a break in the afternoon to go see a movie and Papa Marty and Mr. Otis had our first bonding time alone.
But first Graham got Otis all ready for our big adventure. I don’t know Graham all that well, having only met him a few times, once when I visited California last year and another when Chelsea and he came to Oklahoma on their own epic road trip in the spring. That trip was a 6 week music tour around the entire US of A in a little Saturn car while Chelsea was preggers so yes, it was truly epic! Graham has been a very attentive and hands on father, playing with Otis, changing diapers, just taking care of business as a father. It’s been good to see.
While he slept I did a bit of work in the kitchen, moving out the fridge to put in a plug and mopping the floor. After that we went for a walk around the neighborhood. I introduced him to the jungle that is in the Berkeley Hills, with an elephant standing guard in a corner yard.
It was made of old pieces of tires. It was amazing.
A lot of Berkeley is amazing. While most homes don’t have huge land mammals in their yards, most of the homes have fantastic flowers and landscaping in their hilly lots. The homes are of all sorts, with a large percentage being of the Arts and Crafts movement, one of my favorite architectural styles.
The day ended with us going out to a Himalayan Restaurant on Shattuck Avenue in what is known as the Gourmet Ghetto area of Berkeley. It is too, amazing amount of restaurants in a very short stretch. It was really good!
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California Road Trip
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 16, 2014 | California Road Trip - 2014, Family History, Travel |
Hello Napkin Kin!
I’ve been gone on an epic solo road trip to Berkeley, California and back. It was 9 days, 3,675 miles and 62 hours in the car. I took 2.5 days to get there and 3 to get back with 3 and 1/2 days in Berkeley visiting my daughter Chelsea and partner Graham along with my first Grandson, Otis!
I didn’t post here during the trip because I posted on instagram, Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr instead. I figured I would show you the pics in 2-3 posts.
Airbnb
I have done similar trips before where I pushed it to 2 days and even 30 hours straight but I decided to do a little Airbnbing this time around. Do you know what Airbnb.com is? It’s an online room renting service. I first used it back in 2012 for 4 days in New York City when I spoke at Blog World. I rented a room in a little apartment in the West Village and loved it. So on this trip I not only found rooms on the trip out and back but stayed 4 days in Berkeley at an Airbnb home as well. Chelsea and Graham live in a studio apartment with a newborn so staying with them was NOT going to be happening.
So, here are the pics from the way out + some bonus ones only YOU get to see. Aren’t you special?!
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Day One
I was also pulling a trailer full of furniture on the way out. It was a couple of beds, a dresser and miscellaneous tables for them to put in their little studio space. I started off on Saturday around noon after coaching my running group. I ran 9 miles which I thought wouldn’t be so long a run as to make a long road trip immediately afterward unbearable. I was right, my legs and the drive were fine. My goal was to get to Albuquerque, New Mexico by 10pm or so.
I wasn’t deep in the heart of Texas, more along the edge, but the Panhandle is about as Texas as it gets. I loved the simple design of the two stars, one a shadow cutout, the other a window to the sky. Texas has some of the best tourist info areas, always well designed and interesting.
Texas Information Center, Texas Panhandle
If you are wondering of West Texas is a flat as they say? Yes, it is.
I hit the New Mexico border at sunset and was able to grab a shot of the sun setting in the Land of Enchantment.
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Day Two
The flowers outside my first stop, an Airbnb room in Albuquerque, were amazing – especially after the sun rose and they were brightly lit.
I took off early and as I turned my first corner leaving town I found this rising to greet me as the day dawned.
Later in the day I hit the high desert area of California. The Mojave Desert to be exact. It’s not all one big sand dune, most deserts aren’t actually. But it is arid and stark. But that arid starkness leads to incredible beauty and exquisite design.
This was taken in Boron, California. When I was a kid there was a cleaning product called 24 Mule Team Borax. I always knew it came from here, Boron in the high desert. And now I’ve seen it.
I spent night 2 at a fantastic Airbnb location in Tehachapi, California. It is also in the high desert, at the western edge right before you travel down into the central valley and Bakersfield. Richard was my host and he was attentive, interesting and engaging. We talked about our mutual lives (he had lived 40 years in Hawaii as a dive instructor) before I went to bed.
The house was built by a silent screen star named Thelma after her retirement in the 60s and he had spent the past year doing renovations to the place. It was immaculate.
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Day 3
He had an indoor pool that I was able to swim in in the morning. It is solar heated and was fantastic. Yes, that is a rubber ducky in my hand and no, that is not my tail coming out behind me.
My first official stop in California was at the home of Cyndi and Darrell Blaschak in Livermore. Cyndi is the younger sister of my exwife Kathy. In addition to furniture for Chelsea I had brought on piece, an old sled bed, for Kathy as well. She had left it with me when she had moved back to California from Tulsa in 2004 or so. And now, 10 years later, I was bringing it back. Unfortunately Kathy lives far north of San Francisco and I wasn’t able to get all the way up there so I dropped it off at Cyndi’s house for safe keeping.
It was great to see Cyndi and Darrell again. I started dating Kathy in 1979 when Cyndi was only about 14 years old so I have known her a long time. She is now a mother of 3 as well as an incredibly active athlete.
And then finally I had arrived at my destination, Otis. Yes, I was going to Berkeley, but I was really going to Otis. He’s only 6 weeks old here. After our introductions Mr. Otis settled down and started to get used to Papa Marty.
Since I still had the trailer attached to the car I wasn’t sure if I would be able to find a parking place at my Airbnb spot nearby. So Chelsea and I hiked the Berkeley Hills for close to a mile to find the spot. On the way Mr. Otis went to his very first library. It was a free library on the street.
Chelsea, Otis and I had dinner at Cafe Gratitude. I chose the ‘I am Humble’ for my dinner but I felt Iwas all those things as I watched my daughter take care of my first Grandson.
As we walked home the sun fired it’s last rays into the Berkeley sky. I am blessed.
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California Road Trip
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
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by Marty Coleman | Dec 6, 2013 | Travel |
I am down in Texas to run my first marathon in 3 years. This is what it looks like throughout Dallas today. More coming tomorrow and temps are staying below freezing until after the marathon is suppose to be over on Sunday.
It looks like they will cancel but as of now (Friday afternoon) they have not.
I also came down to help my daughter move to a new apartment, which we did 2 days early to avoid the weather.
So, for now we are watching the news and waiting for an announcement from the Dallas Marathon organizers.
Running is an adventure!
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by Marty Coleman | Sep 5, 2013 | Darien - 2013, Travel Napkins |
The Flight Home
I spent 9 days on the east coast, going to my HS reunion, visiting my sister, an artist friend and my daughter Rebekah and my first Grandbaby, Vivian. But alas, I eventually had to head back to Tulsa. I was excited to see Linda again, it had been a long trip, but I was very sad to say goodbye to Rebekah and Vin. I spent the hours on my flight home drawing.
The Executive
I got into a conversation with the woman across the aisle as we both sat down but I was on the window seat and when my row partner sat on the aisle, the conversation pretty much stopped. Later the woman on the aisle was trying to sleep and wasn’t having a very easy time of it so I traded places with her so she could lean her head against the interior of the plane. By that time the woman across the aisle, Catherine, was reading so I picked up my sketchbook and started to draw her. I captured her face first, then her hands as quickly as I could since I know they were the most likely part of her to change at any moment, which they did. She brought out her laptop and at that point I started drawing the background.
The entire cabin was dark and the light from her screen lit her face in a beautiful way. I wish I had taken a photo so I could remember the lighting pattern now. We started talking again after a while and I found out she was coming to Tulsa for just one day for work. She was an executive with a large software developer and had a series of meetings starting early the next morning. She was tired after a while and laid her head back to sleep.
This is the drawing before I painted and colored it.
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The Flight Attendant
After my aisle mate started napping I noticed the flight attendant sitting in the jump seat straight ahead. She was in the dark, with one single overhead light above her, and some light from the galley on her left. She was looking right at me so I mouthed the words, ‘I am drawing you.’ and she responded with a smile and a thumbs up.
She sat still for almost the entire time I was drawing. There wasn’t anything going on in the cabin, almost everyone was asleep or at least had their eyes closed. She could have easily changed her arm position, crossed her legs differently or adjusted her clothing or hair, but she did none of that. She just sat still and looked straight ahead. Once in a while she would look at me and I would mouth the words for wherever I was at, ‘I am drawing your legs now.’ or “I finished your dress.” I knew she couldn’t hear me since I was actually making no audible sound, but it was obvious she knew what it was I was saying. She sat that way for probably 20-25 minutes, long enough for me to get a thorough line drawing done.
She had to explain her stillness to her fellow flight attendant at one point, and the other flight attendant came over to see how the drawing was progressing. She thought it looked pretty good and gave Jessica the thumbs up. That made her smile. It was very cool and otherworldly to do the drawing almost in complete darkness, almost like a special bond formed between us as a result. I showed her the line drawing after and she was very happy with it. She introduced herself as Jess and we exchanged contact info so I could get the finished drawing to her. Here is the line drawing before I painted and colored it.
And with that we landed, the lights came up and I was able to be greeted by my lovely wife at the airport. It was a wonderful journey meeting old friends, new family, and strangers who became friends.
I love traveling into the past and finding the present.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Aug 21, 2013 | Darien - 2013 |
An Early Morning Run
Reunions are all about visiting the past while in the present. One of my most anticipated moments of the weekend was not about seeing my old friends. It was about seeing my old town. Yes, I was going to be driving around and seeing it. But what really excited me was to do a long run around it. I am training for a marathon and knew I would need at least a 10 mile run that weekend. So why not spend some time in advance planning out a route that would take me by some of the spots I wanted to see, even some spots I had never seen before. I planned it to start from my hotel using the Dailymile.com site where I record my runs. If I planned it right I would go by some spots I had never seen and some familiar places and get back to the hotel in time to greet my BFF from back in the day, who was coming down from Rhode Island on Sunday morning for the last day of the reunion.
At 7:15 I was out the door and ready to run. Beautiful morning air, the sun just up over the trees and I was happy.
One of the best things about running in a new place is not what you expect to see, but the joy in seeing the unexpected. My first ‘I have to stop and take a picture’ moment was a flock of wild turkeys meandering around a riding ring. I wanted to sneak up further on them to get a better shot but time and the road called me on.
I turned the corner from the turkeys and immediately found this 1850s tombstone in an even older graveyard. One thing that sets New England apart from much of the more westerly parts of the US is how OLD it is. Yes, we have graves this old in Oklahoma and California, but we don’t have little neighborhood cemeteries that are about 3 house lots wide (if that) being such an integral part of the present as you find here.
And then there is this scene. Can you ask for a more picturesque example of a Connecticut waterway? This is Five Mile River and somewhere along it (I don’t remember where) we had our boat docked for a number of summers. I ran along this little lane, stopping beside two local folk who were walking their dog (and also taking pictures). We talked for a few moments as we took some shots, me telling them of my fond memories for the area and being at the reunion. Then they waved me adieu and off I went.
But not before stopping quickly to take a shot of one of the beautiful homes looking out on the scene I showed you above.
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Julie
When I stopped to take the shots above I noticed a woman running up upon me. I started running as she passed and we struck up a conversation. If you know me, there is nothing I love more than meeting new people in unexpected ways and connecting to them. I love meeting people in airports, resorts, restaurants, stores, and on the road. It doesn’t matter where. The odder the place and circumstances, the better.
And so it was with this woman, who I found out was named Julie. As we ran side by side we told each other our running history. She had run in the Nike Women’s Marathon in San Francisco a few years back with her sister. I asked her if she was in training for another race. She chuckled and said her reason for running now did not have such an exalted goal attached to it, “I am a stay-at-home mom of one & a half year old twins. I run to escape!” I understand what she meant.
We ended up running together for 4 miles. She knew the area and so I basically forgot my map route and just let her lead the way as we talked. I told her why I was in Darien for the weekend and she told me she had also gone to the High School, having graduated in 1999. That meant she was just a year older than my oldest daughter, Rebekah, whom I was going to be visiting a few days hence. Rebekah had just given birth to my first grandchild so Julie and her were in almost the exact same place in life. Knowing she had gone to DHS in the late 90s I asked her if my friend, Bruce Hall (see part 1) had been her principal at the time. He had been and she was happy to hear he was doing well. She didn’t know his mother Helene, but she enjoyed hearing me tell her about what a great woman she is.
I, of course, wanted to take her picture as a memento of our serendipitous run together. She wasn’t too hot on the idea due to her being in her ‘I just woke up and ran out the door’ look. But I loved that look, she was energized and alive and beautiful in the best sort of way, and she granted me permission to take the pic.
Funny coda to my Julie story. A few days after I returned I got an email from Bruce saying he had taken his dogs for a walk and had run into an old student of his out for a walk with her twins. She greeted him and told him about having a run with some guy who happened to know him. A small world indeed.
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Church and Girls
My parents didn’t go to church but my best friend Jim’s family did. I started going to the local Congregational Church with them in about 1969 or so. I wasn’t religious (I’m still not) but I love ideas and conversation and church is always a good place for both. Of course at my age then (about 14-15) I loved girls more than ideas or conversation. And Jim and I discovered two girls at the church that we liked a LOT!
Meridith became Jim’s girlfriend and Frances became mine. They were from the other Jr. High, Mather, and thus were ‘exotic’. We were cool to have girlfriends from the other school. We also incurred the wrath of some of the boys from that school, but we didn’t care. Anyway, the boys who hated us then became great friends in High School.
And Meridith and Frances? Well, Jim and Meridith dated quite a while, well into High School. Frances and I didn’t last all that long as BF/GF but we remained great friends throughout High School and beyond. They both turned out to be wonderful woman whom Jim and I are still connected to in the best of ways, as dear, dear friends.
Meridith, now and then
Meridith didn’t make the reunion, but I visited her in Seattle in 2011 and got this shot of her.
Frances, now and then
Frances was at the reunion and I got this shot of her at the Sunday picnic
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Home
The last stop on my running tour was my old home. I had already driven by it but I took a bit of time to really look at it this time. They had changed some things, it has an odd stucco siding on it, something that looks great on a Spanish or California style house, but looks very odd on a simple New England style box.
As much as the house was interesting to see, bringing back memories of sneaking out late at night (or as Frances told me at the reunion, the time Meridith and her snuck out and drove over in their pajamas to hang out with us), it really was the entire street that brought back the sweetest memories. Memories of walking our beautiful Samoyed dog named Vodka (we had alcohol troubles in our family, can you tell?) down the street and back. Memories of the woman who lived behind us and the cat she ran over that I tried to save as it bit my finger in a jaw death grip before it passed away.
Memories of various cars in the driveway, including a Volkswagon Campmobile with a fold down bed. Parents, it might not be the wisest idea to give your teenage son access to such a car. I’m just sayin’…
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Jim
I made my way back to the hotel, figuring I would be back right about the time Jim arrived from Rhode Island. And sure enough, as I ran up to the hotel entrance, Jim was walking up at the same time. He had even passed me on the main drag and figured it was me finishing my run.
Jim and I met when his mother forced him out of his house one afternoon, telling him, ‘Go meet the new kid down the street and don’t come back expecting dinner until you do.’ He walked down Shady Acres Lane and did. We were best of friends from then on. It was a great relationship. His family and home were a refuge for me during some trying family times. His parents were accepting and loving and seemed happy to have me around, even as I tried their patience with some of the mishaps I brought with me.
I am not sure what my house and family offered him, but I did have an older sister who, along with her bevy of best friends, were the hottest girls of the class 2 years before us. For a teenage boy, that’s a pretty good reason to hang around a friend’s house.
We went on spring break road trips together to Florida (during high school no less), spent summer vacations together now and then in Montauk, Long Island and Fire Island off of Long Island. We went on winter skiing adventures to Vermont, me learning nothing about proper skiing form and hitting trees left and right, him learning to avoid the trees with a bit more technique and by watching me. We, along with his older brother Michael, learned to fly airplanes together, yes real airplanes. We were members of the Sky Life Flying Club starting at age 13 and learned to fly little Cessna 150s and 172s. We took Transcendental Meditation together, smoked pot together, learned to drink together. We learned about girls together.
In 1979 we got married within 2 weeks of each other, both attending each other’s wedding. Within short order we had 3 kids each, not too far apart. I am the first to have a grandbaby but I suspect he will have one relatively soon and catch up with me.
It’s great to have an awesome friend like Jim throughout the years.
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You can read and see more of my trip to the East Coast here:
The Napkin Grandbaby
Rebekah and Vivian go to the Laboratory
The Napkin Dad meets the Napkin Mom
The Past and the Present – Reunion, Part 1
The Past and the Present – A Morning Run
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And finally…
I am trying to land a speaking gig at the 2014 SXSW Interactive Conference. I am in their ‘PanelPicker’ process. Meaning I proposed a photography workshop and now people vote on it. There are THOUSANDS of proposals so I need to rally my Napkin Kin to vote for me. So, would you be able to vote for my photography proposal for SXSW? Here is the link.
http://panelpicker.sxsw.com/vote/24603
You do have to register so that sucks but it’s painless at least. If you aren’t comfortable registering, perhaps you can amplify the link on your social media channels. That would be very cool, either way. THANK YOU!
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by Marty Coleman | Aug 15, 2013 | Darien - 2013, Family History |
The Present Moment
Friday night, Aug 2nd, 2013, Linda and I went to the opening of ‘Oh, Tulsa!’ Biennial, a group exhibition featuring work that both celebrates and critiques the city of Tulsa. I had 2 pieces included in it. The first is a photo of me in front of my collage of Tulsa’s KJRH Channel 2 new reporter and anchor, Marla Carter. The second is of Michelle Linn from Fox23, also in Tulsa. These are a part of an ongoing series I have been doing since 2009 called ‘IN Public/Private’ of reporters and anchors I meet in my media travels.
The Tulsa Evening Anchor – Visual Poem #8
Marla and Michelle both were extraordinarily willing to follow my vision for the shoots. They came with NO makeup on (not the usual situation for a TV personality) and let me photograph them that way. They then both put on their makeup as if there were getting ready for the TV lights. Michelle actually came out of the Philbrook Museum bathroom with half her face made up and half still natural just because she thought it looked cool. My kind of model! We did a whole series of shots like that that were great fun.
The Tulsa Morning Anchor – Visual Poem #6
I ended up submitting these two collages for the show since they focused on the personality of Tulsa via those who report about Tulsa to the rest of us.
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The Red Eye to the Past
I wanted to attend the opening but my High School reunion was starting that same night, 1,500 miles away in Darien, Connecticut. I spent my teenage years there, after being raised on the beaches of Southern California. It was a culture shock to say the least, but I adjusted (and they adjusted to me) and I had a fantastic Jr. High and High School experience in that town.
I choose to go to the first hour of the exhibition opening, catch a late flight to Denver then take the red eye flight to NYC, rent a car, get some shut eye, then be there for the majority of the weekend festivities. It was going to mean a likely all nighter, but you only live once so why not.
So, with about 3 (maybe) hours sleep, I did this first thing in the morning. I got a couple hits, scored a couple runs, ran down and slid all over the outfield trying to catch fly balls. The softball game was a fun way to break the ice and play instead of having to immediately go into ‘This is who I am now, who are you?’ mode in conversations.
I had on my Texas Rangers hat. Caitlin, my Texas girl, would be proud that I was representing!
Actually that was after a tour of the new high school. It was a new school, not resembling anything close to our old school, except that it was on the same land, so while it was fun to walk around and shoot the breeze with people, it didn’t really bring back memories as it would have if it was the old school. Still, it was nice seeing our town was continuing to grow and move forward.
The Younger Woman
After the game I knew I needed to get in a nap before the big soiree later that night. But before I did I had a few people I needed to see. First I stopped by the house of a dear friend from High School, Julie Kudenholdt. She was a few years behind me. We dated briefly my senior year but alas, as usual, we lost touch over the decades. But Facebook brought a lot of old friends back together, and she was one of them.
It turns out her beautiful home backs up onto the woods behind our first house in Darien. You can even see our house through the woods during the winter. Julie and her husband Steve were incredibly gracious when I visited, especially considering they had a pool party happening for their daughter, Julie’s mother was just leaving after celebrating her birthday, and Julie’s sister was visiting as well. But no matter; they welcomed me, fed me and we had a great time talking about then and now. Julie is reviving a dormant acting career, being featured in a number of indie projects in NYC. It was great to meet her family and see how she had still retained that beautiful sense of joy, wonder and curiosity about others that I had admired 40 years earlier.
One of the best aspects of the visit was not how the older adults welcomed me, but how the plethora of 21 year olds in bathing suits did. Their daughters and friends were confident, gracious, well-mannered and polished. They spoke well and looked me in the eye. It was a nice reminder of one of the best aspects of my upbringing in that town. We learned how to be confident and act like adults among adults. I appreciate it a great deal now that I look back on it years later.
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The Artist
I then went to visit one of our family’s dearest friends. We moved to Darien in the first place because this family lived here. My mother had met Helene Hall in a grocery store in Hagarstown, Maryland back in the 1950s. They had become friends due to their humor and sass, which they both had in abundance. Helene was an artist and a former show girl in NYC. My mother was a debutante from a wealthy family who nevertheless made merciless fun of the pretentions of that world. But she was refined in her appreciation of art and connected to Helene from then on.
When our family was going to make the move to the east coast, my mother naturally wanted to live near Helene, who had moved to Darien with her husband Floyd and son Bruce, and so we did as well.
Helene was instrumental in my art education and inclination. Starting at age 13 she was always encouraging me in practical ways to create and understand art. One of her most enduring lessons came when she took me into New York City to the Museum of Modern Art. We were there to see a Picasso sculpture exhibition. But they were made out of cardboard, and paper, and junk. They were not made out of what sculpture was suppose to be made out of. And, as one often hears from people who don’t understand art, I said to her, “I could do that!” while looking at one of these supposedly easy to create pieces. She stopped me right then and said, “Ok, then do it. I challenge you to get whatever material you want, and make a sculpture. Then explain to me why you made it and what it’s all about.” I accepted the challenge, went home, bought some material, mostly thick gauge metal wire and proceeded to start making a sculpture. I would show her.
But I didn’t show her. She showed me. I never did finish the piece. It hung around in our basement work bench until I finally threw it away, just a bunch of junk taking up space. It was that practical lesson that taught me in real life what she had told me at the museum in response to my ignorant dismissal of Picasso’s work. She said, “What matters isn’t IF you can make it. What matters is if you DO make it.” And I realized then that art derives from an idea, from a passion, from an understanding of something and from a desire to understand something even deeper. it isn’t primarily about material or technique. It’s primarily driven by the idea. I have never forgotten that and I always try to keep the idea, no matter who fractured it is, close to the essence of my images.
Helene Hall and her son, Bruce Hall
Helene Hall and Me
Here is Helene today, 96 years old, nearing the end but still filled with life and love. I made sure I told her how important she had been to my art life. Her son, Bruce, laughed when I did and said, “You know what’s funny? My best friend says almost the exact same thing to Helene each and every time he comes to visit.” Helene knew how to inspire and push art out into the world in her own work and in her friendships with others. I am trying to emulate that same spirit in my life and art as well.
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You can read and see more of my trip to the East Coast here:
The Napkin Grandbaby
Rebekah and Vivian go to the Laboratory
The Napkin Dad meets the Napkin Mom
The Past and the Present – Reunion, Part 1
The Past and the Present – A Morning Run
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