No matter your work you have to do the hard detail work if you want to be considered a professional. You have to be meticulous and thorough. You have to think about entire projects, plan things out and work to make it happen. Hoping is fine, dreaming is fine, wishing is fine. But none of those will create your work for you, none will create your destiny. Only work and perseverance will do that.
I like it because it is true AND because it makes me ask ‘What am I not?’ and ‘What am I?’ two questions it is always good to consider in the pursuit of growth and wisdom, as well as imagination and humor.
“Imagination was given to compensate for what we are not, and humor to console us for what we are.” – Francis Bacon, 1561-1626, English Author and Philosopher
While this may be true of those looking up with envy, the quote actually made me think of those who are higher up. For every person we see above us, there is someone who didn’t rise as far. What is your attitude towards them? Are you looked at as that person who is ungrateful? Have you considered who helped you and the gratitude you owe them?
Maybe it is the administrative assistant who first helped you understand the complexities of office politics. Now that you are a manager, are you still paying attention to that person?
Maybe it is a family member who first showed you how to use a camera and explained how to organize your photos. She remained a hobby photographer. You have gone on to professional photography, but have you stopped to thank that person for helping you on your way?
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
“One is apt to complain of the ingratitude of those who have risen far above oneself.” – Samuel Johnson, 1709-1784, English Author
Expecting something of value to happen in your life without pre-conditions of the exact nature of the event isn’t easy. But if you practice being open to whatever happens and finding the preciousness within it, then it won’t matter if it is gold, silver or dirt.
Drawing and Commentary by Marty Coleman
“Too many people miss the silver lining because they are expecting gold.” – Maurice Setter, 1936-not dead yet, English football (soccer) player
When we are non-grateful we look at what is missing, what we want or feel we should have.
In art instruction there is a technique to help people see the object they are drawing by having them focus on the negative space. the space between and around objects and its shape. Seeing that helps to see the object.
However, in life seeing what isn’t there is a double edged sword. Should you work to attain what you want, work for that you do not have? Sure, it’s a good thing. But to look at what a person doesn’t give instead of what they do isn’t always the same thing. To look at what a society doesn’t give isn’t always the same thing.
Instead of focusing on what is missing, the negative space in your partner, your boss, your child, your society, your culture, focus on the positive space. The things they actually do and be grateful. It doesn’t mean you don’t try to attain something greater. It doesn’t mean you can’t say when your needs aren’t being met. It simply means you acknowledge what is really there.
I am grateful for those of you who read my blog and enjoy the drawings and ideas. I appreciate when you write and tell me stories about your own journey into becoming who you want to be. Thank you.
I was looking for a shopping quote today in anticipation of Black Friday but came to realize as I was searching that Black Friday is primarily not about shopping, it’s about gift giving.
So, a simple question comes to mind. Is the gift you are going to get on Friday a gift that the recipient will feel was given with them in mind? Will it show your gratitude for them, your love for them or will it show you spent money because that is what you are suppose to do?
Will the present be buried in the past without a second thought, or will it be treasured because it came from love?
You may ask, how can I know what that is? You know by paying attention to the person. Not when they are writing down their wish list, but throughout the year. Listen to what they talk about, what they care about. That will tell you how you can meet their needs with a gift. That will show you are acting grateful, not just saying you are grateful.
This Thanksgiving I am going to be thankful for, along with the usual suspects of family, friends, health and safety, contentment. That I am either content with who I am and what I do, or I am taking action that will lead to that contentment. Sit and be content this week.
“Thanksgiving, like contentment, is a learned attribute. The person who hasn’t learned to be content lives with the delusion he deserves more or something better.” – Robert Flatt
A vintage napkin from back in 2004, the last year I drew them for my daughters’ lunches. I think this is true of the public and those close to you. Arguing a point to no avail only to find them agree with it after someone on TV says it is frustrating. LOL
When I was teaching drawing back in California in the 80s and 90s I use to use a few techniques to help my students really ‘see’ their subject or the art clearly, without the unconscious assumptions they were using. One was to turn the art in progress upside down and have them look at it. Another was to have them hold a hand mirror and look at their work (or the subject) through it. Yet another was to have them put their work at the end of a long, long breezeway or hallway and look at it from as far away as possible.
The purpose of course was to help them see their work more clearly, to notice things they weren’t likely to see when standing at arm’s length or within the constrains of how they would normally look at it.
Translate that into your life. How do you look at things (or people). Do you see the person you think is ugly and find the good angle, the good light and see their beauty? Do you change your thinking about them and see their beauty? What about events? Can you change the way you look at the traffic jam? Maybe it gives you more time to listen to that good book on CD? What about a rainy day? Does it mess up your plans and depress you, or can you look at it another way and find a great new thing to do indoors (or even outdoors in the rain!)
Your perception is what makes reality, not the ‘real’ world. Change the perception and the world changes.
Thanks to my new friend Erin Christy for having this quote on her Facebook page!
Drawing and commentary @ Marty Coleman
“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” – Dr. Wayne Dyer, 1940-not dead yet, American Author and Speaker
This one is worth considering even though I am not sure I agree with it.
It does seem to be true when you look at the great innovators in history. Almost all of them had a set of rules they had to at least ignore if they were to make the scientific or cultural progress they ended up making.
Of course, when I say rules I am not necessarily talking about written set of rules. I am talking about the socially understood parameters of behavior, expression, study, investigation, etc.
So, what about the non-innovators? What about the regular joes of the world who just go about their business, who is remembered among them? Are you remembered for smoking in the bathroom in school 1 year after the fact, 30 years after the fact? Are you remembered for being a great, rule abiding mother or father? See, in these cases, I don’t know if this quote really does hold true or not. What do you think?
I think it is understood that not ALL opportunities need to be taken, and some you do take will end in dead ends. But this quote isn’t for those who are willing to take risks and step through the door, it is for those who are afraid. They are afraid they will get hurt, or it will taste bad or they will get lost or they may look foolish or they might die or they will fail or they will lose what they already have or….the list is endless.
The truth is those things are excuses, not reasons. The reason to not take advantage of an opportunity is because, after evaluating, you honestly feel it is not worth doing. It isn’t likely to give the results you want, you might have already done it a number of times, who knows. But you have honestly thought it through.
Excuses are those things that you say to rationalize the unconscious real reason. And it isn’t just the things you say, it is the way you design your life to make grabbing opportunities impossible. Maybe you have too many obligations, or too many pets, or too little money or too few friends or too much weight or too little education or…..
What is your excuse and how and why did you design it into your life?
“Life opens up opportunities to you, and you either take them or you stay afraid of taking them.” – Jim Carrey, 1962-not dead yet, American comedian and actor
Cheerleader a fixture in the vintage napkins. She was always cheery. I would draw her when I wanted someone representing ‘being positive’ even if she was also a bit dense or naive about things.
But she turned out to not be dense and after leaving high school she went on to the Sorbonne in Paris, then to Oxford for her Ph.D. She is still there.
She is through with her goth phase and is now back to her cheery self, though with red hair and three tattoos her mother and father don’t know about yet.
She can still fit in her uniform and wears it every Halloween and sometimes to root for the Oxford rugby team for which her BF plays.
I am not a believer in all things being ‘small’ and not worthy of ‘sweat’ as the book title suggests. There are some things worth sweating over and not all stuff is small stuff.
But it is also true that people FREAK out over things that are small, that are not emergencies. I often wonder if it isn’t something biological that unconsciously requires certain people to stress, to freak out, as if the act of stressing makes something happen in their bodies and brains that is needed. It might not be healthy, but somehow the body and brain feed off it, need it, and so their life is designed to have stress, to have drama, even if they say they don’t like it.
That is one of the most important things to look at when trying to figure out how to change your life. Figure out WHY you like this thing you say you hate enough to have it repeat again and again. The thing you hate whether it be stress or drama or something else, gives you something you want, inspite of you hating it. What is that?
“Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. Everything isn’t that important.” – Natalie Goldberg, 1948-not dead yet, American Author
I love the sky, especially here in Oklahoma. When people ask me if I miss California I usually say the landscape is better there but the skyscape is much better here in Oklahoma.
It is easy to see the landscape; it is permanent for the most part, it will always be there, and so we feel like we can define ourselves in relationship to it. It is like a non-fiction story of history or science. We believe we are hearing a true story, something real.
But the sky is a different story. It is a novel. It is a poem. It is not telling us something we can rely on to be true because it disappears and may not come back. If it does it will be different. How can we rely on the sky? But isn’t it true, it is always changing yes, but it is always returning as well. It comes back and becomes something you knew before, the clouds aren’t exactly the same, but they remind. It is the reminder as in a novel, of your own life, your own history. It is a poem that gives hints, that gives bread crumbs reminding you of something else, a remembrance.
This is an homage to all the scientists out there, including my incredible eldest daughter, Rebekah, a Ph.D. candidate in Neuroscience at George Mason University in Virginia.
The heart of science, from the beginning, when it was one and the same with religion, is to find out why things are the way there are and how to fix, change, improve, build upon, or just understand as much as possible.
To be a good scientist you have to withstand the appearance of absurdity in what you seek. Like the paleontologist looking for bones, having to answer questions from his mother or father about how he can make a living, or what good it will do to find some old bone anyway.
Or the cosmologist who has the engineer for a best friend who chides her for always having her head beyond the clouds and never producing much while she, on the other hand, has built a car or a bridge or something practical.
But it is the scientist who will discover where we came from, where we are going, who we are, how we can survive, what kills us, what saves us, and why it is so. It is the scientist who is searching and in the searching, absurd as it seems, is finding and becoming great in the process.
I love scientists.Pass this on to one you love, too!
A perfect quote for all you entrepreneurs, business and sales people out there.
I recently had a problem with my Mac Pro. I know, not a common occurrence. I went in to the Apple store to buy a new graphics card, which is where I thought the problem lied. At the last minute I told the 2 (yes, 2) guys helping me that I didn’t want to spend the money to have the computer looked at to see if it was really the problem. They said it’s all free at the store, just make an appointment and bring it in, which I did.
The diagnosis was the logic board, not the graphics card. More money, time in the shop, not a good thing. I left the computer and 2 days later got a call saying it was the graphics card after all and that because they held the computer for so long the card would be free. Yes, free.
I got the computer back and found only one of the monitors (I have 2) was working. I diagnosed it and found the new graphics card takes two power cables, one for each monitor and they had given me only one. I called and explained the problem. They ordered a completely new graphics card because it was the only way to get the extra cable. They had it the next day.
So, I had a problem. The company not only fixed the problem and any ensuing problems but did so in such a way that I want to stay with Apple. I want to support Apple. I want to revisit that store. I want to buy again from Apple. They exceeded my expectations not just with the one on one interaction, but in their way of diagnosing (right in front of me, with full explanation) and in their policy of getting things right, no matter what.
Do you do that with your clients? Do you design your company to do that?
That is the key, isn’t it. To stop oneself before doing something stupid or damaging or hurtful. Repenting in advance does seem to be the one thing people don’t do enough of!
I know we don’t all have great memories of the past. But here it seems to be talking about the good memories we have and how they came to be good memories. How did we remember them in the way we did. It might have been a day at the beach with your lover, or a great time at the amusement park with your child or parent. You look back and forget the heat of that day but remember the fun. You might forget the hassle of finding parking but remember the beautiful fresh salt air breeze of the beach.
Can you see the ‘perfect’ in the ‘present’? Can you focus on that. Not the crowded elevator trip, but the great smile of the receptionist. Not the wait to get your lunch, but the restful moment of relaxation that comes after you sit down.
It is a choice about what you pay attention to and what you focus on.
Another proverb for you. This one from my vintage napkin collection that I gave to my daughters in their school lunches.
I was going to draw something about exercise today, but I am SO tired, I didn’t have the energy.
Seriously though, as the saying goes… ‘You can sleep when you are dead’! Get up and move, try something, anything to be active. Not just to stay fit, but to see the world. The world in the field next door, the world at 6am, the world down under. Wherever, whenever. Be curious, be fit, and find friends doing it.
Just thinking of the Fort Hood shooting yesterday and how horrendous the shock and emotion is for those connected to it, whether right in the middle of the shooting or family and friends.
No matter what the grief, don’t try to push people to ignore it, and don’t ignore it yourself. You don’t have to get rid of it, or hide it. Let it exist. Just sit with them, hold their hand. Grieve with them.
I know, sometimes my drawings just make no sense. But I did have a very pointed message in my reasoning for drawing this. I just forget what it was now.
This quote jumped out at me today as being the perfect example of 21st century failure, and I mean that in both a good and a bad way.
In the good way, we are taught that we should learn (cash in on) from our mistakes. That is a universal lesson, easy to grasp, hard to implement.
In the bad way we have the obsession with confessional celebrities from Brittney to Lindsay to Paris to Jon to any number of knuckleheaded politicians who figure out a way to cash in on their stupidity or bad judgment. But it isn’t just the public figures that get sucked into the ‘stumble but make sure you get publicity’ mentality. We do it with our own confessions of failures and shortcomings.
Think about this quote. It is meant to be somewhat facetious, a sarcastic slap in the face to the idea of taking credit for something you probably shouldn’t be too proud of. I don’t mean that we shouldn’t extol the virtue of those who have overcome adversity, but overcoming is defined by the amount of publicity you get, it’s defined by the true redemption you exhibit.
“A failure is a man who has blundered, but is not able to cash in on the experience.” – Elbert Hubbard, 1856-1915, American Philosopher – interesting notes: He died on the Lusitania cruise ship when it was torpedoed by the Germans during WWI. L. Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology, was his nephew.
The truth is we are never going to attend to only one or the other. We will always be paying attention to the trite and base things to some degree. To WHAT degree is the question.
Do you spend your entire day thinking of these trivial, maybe mean-spirited things? Do you focus continually on gaining things and status for yourself? Do you worry constantly about how you appear to others? Do you judge others based solely on surface elements?
And the bigger question, do you offset any of those obsessions with deeper thoughts and actions that help you call into question your focus, that help turn you towards higher good for yourself and others.
Maybe it is church that does it, listening to the sermon. Maybe it is walking in nature. Maybe it is reading wisdom from the ages. Maybe it is watching and evaluating the moral tales on TV (yes, there are many good lessons to be learned on TV). Whatever it is, are you paying attention? How are you balancing your life towards the greater things?
It doesn’t happen by accident, especially in a capitalist driven world that is geared towards wanting you to be a consumer, to spend money. You have to be deliberate about inventing yourself, about creating the greater self you want to be.
“He who attends to his greater self becomes a great man, and he who attends to his smaller self becomes a small man.” – Mencius, 372 – 289 BCE, Chinese philosopher
No matter your work you have to do the hard detail work if you want to be considered a professional. You have to be meticulous and thorough. You have to think about entire projects, plan things out and work to make it happen. Hoping is fine, dreaming is fine, wishing is fine. But none of those will create your work for you, none will create your destiny. Only work and perseverance will do that.
