by Marty Coleman | Mar 20, 2014 | Marty Coleman, Meh Meh Mediocrity - 2013 |
Today is the appropriate day to talk about Christianity’s love affair with mediocrity.
The ‘Inappropriate’ Outfit
A friend of mine who has modeled for our photography group here in Tulsa attends a fashion design college. She was called out in front of her classmates recently for her ‘extremely inappropriate’ choice of clothing by her teacher. She said it was inappropriate because the college was a ‘christian college’.
She was quite upset by the confrontation because she takes great pride in her fashion choices and styles. It was embarrassing and humiliating for her. The outfit consisted of a typical black tank top and black long pants along with a black leather jacket. I have seen a photo of her outfit and it is well within acceptable bounds for a young woman in America, especially at a fashion design school. It seems to me that it was an act of public shaming on the part of the teacher that isn’t easy to explain.
Slut Shaming?
It made me start thinking about Christianity’s obsession with ‘appropriateness’. Why did this teacher think the outfit was inappropriate? Were there men ogling the student? Were women whispering behind her back? Were her private parts showing? Maybe the teacher herself was unable to concentrate because she was so distracted by the outfit? Did the teacher think my friend was in danger of appearing too ‘loose’ or ‘slutty’ and would get sexually assaulted as a result?
Reputation and Judgment
I actually don’t think the teacher thought any of those things. I think the teacher’s reputation was threatened. I think she, and many Christians, wants a world where no one can question their appropriateness. And to do that they have to make sure no one thinks they approve of others who are supposedly inappropriate. Not just other people, but whole arenas of activity and effort in the creative world; fashion, art, music, dance, film. They are quick to judge because they themselves are worried about being seen as insufficiently righteous if they don’t.
Christian Mediocrity
What is the result of that mindset? The result is mediocrity. They are firmly planted in the safe middle with safe music, safe art, safe fashion, safe film. They don’t have to consider new creative ideas and images because they have already have a handy pre-judgment at hand that declares those ideas and images as inappropriate. And something judged to be inappropriate, even without good reasons behind the judgment, can be dismissed without consideration.
And mediocrity thrives when new ideas aren’t allowed to be considered.
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Drawing, quote and commentary by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Mar 19, 2014 | Bodyless Ghirl Ghosts - 2012-2013, Marty Coleman |
Last we saw them, the bodyless Ghirl Ghosts were having a Bodyless Ghirl Ghosts Weekend. Meanwhile, their Ghost babies were being baby sat back home.
Ghost Babies
Wait… you didn’t know ghosts had baby ghosts? Yep, they can. If the ghosts have bodies they have babies the normal ghost way, through their ghost private parts. But if they are bodyless Ghirl Ghosts like the ghosts in our story, they can’t do it that way since they don’t have ghost private parts. So, they give birth to their baby bodyless ghosts through their mouths. Yes, Once they have ghost sex (which for bodyless ghosts is just making out) they pop them out like bubbles from their ghost mouth. Hard to believe, but it’s true.
Ghost Ghoos
So, while their ghost moms were off having their little holiday, the baby ghirl ghosts were being baby sat. Another cool thing about being a ghost is you don’t need other ghosts to babysit. All you need is Ghost Ghoo. Ghost Ghoo is something all ghosts can release, sort of like ghost poop, but it’s not gross. It is a part of the ghost who let’s it out that stays behind. The ghost gives it instructions and it follows them. It’s like a ghost rhobot. So, in this case the ghost ghoos was instructed to take care of the baby ghosts. They fed them, got them to take naps, let them play safely, took them on field trips and more.
Causing Trouble for the Ghoos
But on this day there was trouble. The baby ghosts being taken care of by the red ghost ghoo got very rambunctious and wouldn’t obey the Red Ghost Ghoo. They fought, tried to run away and played practical jokes on the Red Ghost Ghoo. It got so bad that the Red Ghost Ghoo broke apart into pieces, which is what ghost ghoos do when they get really flustered. The biggest piece collapsed on the floor into a ghoo pile and started to cry.
The other Ghost Ghoos; Orange, Blue, Green and Pink, did their best to round up all the baby ghosts that the Red Ghost Ghoo had been taking care of. It took them a long time and they were none too happy about it. They gave a stern lecture to the baby ghosts about obeying authority and made them apologize to the Red Ghost Ghoo.
Horror Movie
As punishment and as a lesson about what happens when they don’t obey they made them watch a very scary horror movie about evil people trying to destroy them called Ghostbusters.
The End
To see and read the whole Ghirl Ghost series of short stories, click on the ‘series’ drop down menu to the right and go to ‘Bodyless Ghirl Ghosts‘.
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Drawing and story by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Mar 13, 2014 | Marty Coleman, Simplicity - 2009-2014 |
SXSW
I am back from 6 days at SXSW Interactive in Austin, TX. I led a workshop then attended presentations and panels on a wide range of topics. Being there is the ultimate in complex reality. Between the overwhelming crowds and choices; the sheer logistics of eating, drinking, transporting, sleeping, and the intense focus of meeting, talking, learning, teaching, communicating, and remembering it all, it was anything but simple.
The Simplicity of Thinking Now
The only way I could keep it simple was to be focused on what was in front of me. Whether it was a person I was meeting for the first time, a slide on a screen, a lecturer, or a transportation moment, paying attention to that alone allowed it to stay as simple as it could be at the moment.
The Complexity of Thinking Not Now
Yes, I was multitasking. for example, I wanted to tweet (find me at @thenapkindad) what was being said but I also wanted to take notes. My solution? My tweets became my notes. When I got in trouble was when I thought ahead instead of stayed with what I was doing. For example, leaving my hotel in the morning. I never forgot my badge, thank God, but I did forget my water bottles one day. Doesn’t seem like a big deal, but when water is 3.25 a bottle? It’s a big deal. I forgot my schedule booklet one day and had to go over to registration (a long way in a big convention center) to get a new one, one not marked up with all my notes. I had left mine in the hotel bathroom when I went back in to make sure I was empty before starting my day. Twice while at the conference I left a water or coffee behind that cost way too much to leave behind. Yes, I went back and got them each time and it added frazzlement to my day.
Less Thoughts, More Thinking
All this made me think about Simplicity. I realized I didn’t need to think less, I needed to have less thoughts. When I limited the amount of thoughts or was able to unify those thoughts into a clear thread of thinking, then I was successful in getting the most out of my time and efforts. That’s simple enough, right?
Check out the rest of the Simplicity Series here.
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Drawing, quote and commentary by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Mar 5, 2014 | Dorothea Lange, Photography |
An Apology
First off, my apologies if you tried to get to my site yesterday. It was hacked and down for most of the day. With the help of a great PHP coder, Jim Gillispie, I was able to get it back up and running just in time for a momentous week ahead. Thanks Jim!
SXSW
I am headed to the SXSW (South by Southwest) Interactive Conference in Austin, TX tomorrow. I am leading a workshop called, ‘The Compelling Image in the Age of Social Media‘ on Friday. I wanted one more napkin for my presentation so I drew this one.
If you are headed to SXSW and would like to attend my ‘workshop‘, get your name on the waiting list as soon as you can and hopefully a spot will open up. The best and quickest way to contact me there will be via twitter. My handle is @thenapkindad.
Seeing With a Camera
One of the best quotes about photography is this if/then proposition: “If you want to take a beautiful photograph, then stand in front of something beautiful and press the button.” This proposition is true but there is a variable within it. That variable is what you consider to be beautiful. For me, a series of questions follow from that variable: Is my mind open to seeing beauty that isn’t readily apparent? Can I see beauty in details, in unexpected and hidden places, within something larger that may not be beautiful? Can I escape judgment long enough to explore an alternative appreciation for something?
I believe my camera can often be a gateway to that freedom, both for me as the photographer in the moment of discovery and later for the viewer of the image in the moment of revelation.
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Drawing by Marty Coleman
Quote by Dorothea Lange, 1895-1965, American photographer
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by Marty Coleman | Mar 1, 2014 | Illustrated Short Stories |
Shades of Brown – An Illustrated Short Short Story
She was intensely focused on her writing as I had a Prague Mocha & Oatmeal Raisin cookie and drew her.
The End
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Drawing and story by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 26, 2014 | Illustrated Short Stories |
The Interview
Prologue
My car was being serviced. I was sitting at Starbucks.
Chapter 1
She was there a long time before he arrived. She had nothing to eat or drink. She had pale and rosy skin that glowed against the gray painting behind her.
Chapter 2
He arrived on the windy day. He immediately came over to her and shook her hand. He said, “You look just like your picture.”
She responded, “I’ve colored my hair since then.”
He said, “I like it. It’s fun.”
Chapter 3
They talked a long time. He gestured a lot with his left hand but never with his right. He had a small mocha and stirred it with his left hand when he wasn’t gesturing. She frequently looked down at her phone, using both hands to text. He didn’t stop talking or gesturing. She asked him some questions. She said “uh huh” and “like” often.
Chapter 4
He excused himself to go to the bathroom. When he got back she stood up and shook his hand. She said, “Thank you, it was nice meeting you.” Then he left. She watched him go out into the windy day.
Chapter 5
She put her phone to her ear and waited. Then she said, “Yea, it went ok. He’s not a good fit though. He doesn’t even use Twitter. Plus he wore brown shoes with a grey suit, who does that? When is the next interview for again?”
Epilogue
I saw her again a week later at the same Starbucks. She had a young man with her. He was dressed in purple and grey and they were going over a spreadsheet. She was doing the explaining and he was looking at her with awe. She had a Wired Magazine and a Vogue Magazine beside her computer. She had nothing to drink.
The End
Drawing and story by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 25, 2014 | Barbara Kingsolver, Mother's Day - 2011, Mothers Day |
We wave goodbye to the Mothers series with drawing #4.
This is true of fathers too, by the way.
The Gift
When I left home in 1973 for college, I really left. I went to college in Ohio, then Massachusetts, then moved to Hollywood, then to more college in Southern California, then to Michigan and back to California, this time Northern. I felt confident and able to make my way in the world and that is what I did. My parents raised me so I would be able to do that. I am very grateful for that gift.
The Forgetting
But with that confidence also came a forgetfulness. I forgot how much I had, at one point, needed them, especially my mother. I wish now I had repaid that attention with attention back to her in her later years. While I visited with some regularity, it really wasn’t as much as it should have been. My mother taught me well how to cope, and how not to cope, with life. I learned invaluable lessons from her, even when she was not aware of her teaching me. I did let her know some of that, and thank her for it, as best I was even aware of it at the time. But she died when she was young, only 62, and I was deep in the middle of raising young kids at the time, not really all the way to the place where I understood the lessons so I wasn’t able to thank her as I would want to now.
The Much Sweet and The little Bitter
Now my daughters are all grown. And all of them are strong and independent and able to make their way in the world. They make their missteps just as I did, but for the most part they are more than capable of correcting the misstep and moving on. They like hearing from me and they probably call me more than I call them. But they don’t need me the way they once did. A little bittersweet but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
The joy of seeing someone who once knew nothing of how to cope with the world navigate through it with class and intelligence is a heart-filling thing for a parent. I think it is probably easier for me, maybe as a man, maybe just as me, I am not sure, than it is for their mothers. But even though it might be harder, I know it makes them so very proud to see their daughters strong and capable, able to move forward on their own, just as it does me as well.
What is your story of letting go of your mother or your child? Was it easy, hard? How did you do it?
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Barbara Kingsolver, 1955 – not dead yet, American author
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 21, 2014 | Marty Coleman, Mother's Day - 2011, Mothers Day |
What a perfect day to present Mothers #3!
Perfection in Parenting
After Mothers #1 was published earlier this week a comment was posted by Julie from APlaceforThoughts.com. Julie was worried about failing at her work as a mother, comparing herself to her father who had to raise her on his own and had done a great job in her estimation. In the course of that conversation I came up with the above quote to try to assure her that it wasn’t about perfection in parenting, it was about love in parenting.
The thing is, kids are looking for love, not perfection. If you are supporting them and encouraging them and guiding them, they don’t really care if you are good at math, or able to run a marathon or make a million dollars a year. And if you do do all those things but don’t show them love, they don’t really care much about those accomplishments either.
Love Over Limitations
We all have our limitations in physical capabilities, emotional strength and intellectual prowess. One mother is missing an arm and a leg. Another never graduated from high school. A third is fragile emotionally. But none of that matters if they make the decision to deliver love to their children as best they are able. That is what the child will remember. That is what the child will pass on to their children.
Don’t expect to deliver perfection in your parenting. Expect to deliver love.
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Drawing, quote and commentary by Marty Coleman
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 20, 2014 | Travel Napkins |
Once again this week I needed to take a car in for servicing. This time it was my car. And again I spent the time waiting at Starbucks. This time I drew 3 drawings, one on a napkin, one in my small sketchbook, and one in a larger sketchbook I was given as part of the launch program. I also drew a number of work sketches for a new character I am working on for Napkin Dad Publishing .
I usually use a Sharpie Ultra Fine Point black pen for my napkin drawings. If I am actually traveling away from Tulsa I will have a selection of my colored markers with me as well but in town I just bring the black pen and wait until I am home to do any coloring.
This is Elaine. I drew her as she worked, then showed her the drawing. She seemed pleased. She took a picture and posted it on FB and very soon thereafter a mutual friend commented on the drawing saying it looked like a ‘Marty Coleman’ drawing. I thought that was cool.
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After that I moved to my sketchbook and drew two people in conversation. I use a different pen for my sketchbook. Recently I have been using a Signo UniBall for these types of drawings.
I would have shown her the drawing but they were deep in conversation, perhaps even an interview. I didn’t want to interrupt. They then left quickly and there was no time to show them.
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This final drawing I did in a large sketchbook. I had been drawing some studies for a character I am looking to develop for Napkin Dad Publishing, sort of a lead icon type character. I had done about 5 of those and was starting to repeat myself so I turned the page and started drawing these two people in conversation.
I didn’t show them the drawing because neither image really flatters them much and it gets pretty sensitive when I draw an inaccurate drawing of someone. I know it doesn’t look like them (nose too big, teeth to severe) but no matter what an artist says to a subject, they will take away that they really do look like that. So, sometimes it’s best to just not show it and move on.
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I then turned to working on my SXSW presentation coming up in 2 weeks (March 7th) in Austin. I have it on my cell phone so I am able to work on it to some degree. It’s great for making sure the timing, images and transitions are all working (they weren’t). It’s also great to see how it will appear on mobile devices.
Then the car place called and it was time to go. All in all a productive & creative morning.
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by Marty Coleman | Feb 19, 2014 | Jane Sellman, Mother's Day - 2011, Mothers Day |
Yesterday we wondered why, if evolution were true, mothers don’t have more hands.
Well, today I solved that problem.
SAHM, WAHM, WAW and WAHWEE
The Stay at Home Mom (SAHM) supposedly that means they don’t ‘work ‘at home, they just ‘stay’ at home. Those that ‘work’ at home, they are WAHMs. The Work at Home Mom combines some sort of job, all the way from part-time self-employed to full time corporate employment, with the bulk of the domestic activities. And then there are the WAWs (I just made this up). The Work at Work mothers go someplace to work and then come home. And then there are the WAHWEEs (I made this up too). Those are the ‘Work at Home & Work & Everywhere Else’ moms.
Most of the women I know, including my wife, sisters, oldest daughter and many friends, are WAHWEEs. In other words, all mothers are working mothers. They do it all and they are awesome.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote by Jane Sellman, American author and college professor
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